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Bizzy View Drop Down
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    Posted: 31 March 2008 at 3:16pm
Were you seen by the social worker or anyone who checked what help you had at home??? were you offered any help, home help perhaps?.
My mother was very surprised that i wasnt as a caesar is major surgery and evern after her hip replacement she was eligible for home help for 6 weeks... She said after any other surgery they quiz you about your circumstances at home before discharging and was very surprised they sent me home without making sure i had help...   

Is this normal? Or was i just a forgotten person?

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cuppatea View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote cuppatea Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 31 March 2008 at 3:26pm
I was never asked or offered any help. I thought that if you had other children though that you were entitled to help.

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james View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote james Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 31 March 2008 at 3:39pm
no wasnt asked either would of been nice though
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NeoshasMummy View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote NeoshasMummy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 31 March 2008 at 5:09pm
Nope I was never offered any help. I asked my midwife and she said

"mothers that dont push their babies out arent entitled to any more help than the next mother" I was like Oh OK then lol. She said that c/s recovery should be fast and if its not its generally due to a) your weight b) your diet c) laziness and an unwillingness to try.

She had more of a stern approach to some topics I guess


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Bizzy View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Bizzy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 31 March 2008 at 5:17pm
Originally posted by NeoshasMummy NeoshasMummy wrote:


"mothers that dont push their babies out arent entitled to any more help than the next mother" I was like Oh OK then lol. She said that c/s recovery should be fast and if its not its generally due to a) your weight b) your diet c) laziness and an unwillingness to try.

She had more of a stern approach to some topics I guess


how rude... its bloody majoy surgery having someone cut thru all those layers of flesh and muscle and what not!

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NeoshasMummy View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote NeoshasMummy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 31 March 2008 at 5:26pm
I know, I kept trying to tell her that I was in ALOT of pain and couldnt get in and out of bed or stand straight and she said that some women just have a higher pain tolerence. Turned out my staples were to tight and had been tugging at the wound causing a very nasty infection.
I was young and nieve but I definately wont tolerate that sort of thing now! She was against C/S I found out later by talking to other nurses and docs and stuff.


EDIT: personally I believe its harder than having a natural birth especially if it was an emergency, u got through hours of painful labour only to be ripped open and stuck in bed for days then only half mobile for weeks after that. I used to feel jelous when I saw people out shopping with their babies the day after having them because I remember just being in agony! Im hoping for a less stressful time during round 2 lol

Edited by NeoshasMummy


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Bobbie View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Bobbie Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 31 March 2008 at 6:05pm
No checks as such but my MW was stoked when she found out DH and my mum would be helping as she said I'd need it (and she was right). She maintained that an elective C was better than a bad vaginal birth anyway.

But if you're labouring and then have a C sect surely you've had a rougher time than someone who has had a straight forward vaginal birth.

Mind you they don't actually cut the muscle during a c-sect unless it's a crash. Otherwise it's just pulled aside so I had better strength than my friend who had his appendix out and did have his muscles cut.


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mummy_becks View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote mummy_becks Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 31 March 2008 at 6:15pm

I think you are Deb as you have other children. Quiz the hospital over the phone about it.

I personally don't know as I haven't had a C/S but when I had my lap (and I don't know if it was coz I went private) but I could of had a few hours of home help each day for a few weeks but I didn't take it up as we had already arranged help for me and Andrew. However after my hystorectomy i'll be taking up any offer.

I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived!
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ElfsMum View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ElfsMum Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 31 March 2008 at 6:35pm
my dad wasnt eligable for home help after hip replacement...:( dunno why..

i had the labour and the emergency c section..i took 4 weeks to feel ok..i dont think my weight mattered..i wasnt lazy unwilling..how rude!:) my mw gave me more visits than usual but i sure wasnt offered extra help..got an extra hospital appointment..lucky me:) but thats it.. if i had other kids i would have thought it would be necessary but i would think unlikely to get help then either:(
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Kels View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Kels Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 31 March 2008 at 9:57pm

Nope I never got offered anything not even pain relief, mind you I went home a day after my c sect cos it was so traumatic I needed to get out of there and the nurses were so MEAN!!


Busy mum to Miss 15yrs, Miss 10yrs and Master 4yrs
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote jack_&_charli Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 31 March 2008 at 11:28pm
i THINK and don't quote me on it.....you can get help if you have other children at home and there's no one there to help you. i asked about it but as DH was off work, i wasn't eligible

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NeoshasMummy View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote NeoshasMummy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 April 2008 at 8:13am
Originally posted by Kels Kels wrote:

Nope I never got offered anything not even pain relief, mind you I went home a day after my c sect cos it was so traumatic I needed to get out of there and the nurses were so MEAN!!



They were mean???/ Thats not very nice, I found the nurses AWESOME BUT I hated being there without my partner I would cry as soon as he left and never slept until he came back so it was a hard time


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Kels View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Kels Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 April 2008 at 1:11pm

They were terrible and being a nurse myself now i would never put up with that sort of treatment. I was very young at the time and with having just laboured for too many hours, had my baby's shoulder stuck on my pelvis bone and then nearly losing her and having an emergency c-sect was too much for a 1st time mum to deal with esp  being a teen mum at that. There werent LMC back then so I had my GP Npractice nurse come and take the staples out at home. SHe did it too early and my wound opened a few layers. As they couldnt staple it back together I had to leave it to heal from the inside. It was a really badtime of my life. I guess in some ways I am still not over it. That became clear to me when I had my son and he was stuck due to the cord around his neck twice and I point blank refused to have a c-sect. they even had the OB there trying to talk me into but I was adament I was having a VB as te horror of my 1st childs birth still haunts me..

 


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Kels View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Kels Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 April 2008 at 1:11pm

EKk sorry Deb, I didnt mean my last post to become a rant


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NeoshasMummy View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote NeoshasMummy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 April 2008 at 1:25pm
Kels that sounds TERRIBLE!!!!!


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Bizzy View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Bizzy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 April 2008 at 2:15pm
Originally posted by Kels Kels wrote:

EKk sorry Deb, I didnt mean my last post to become a rant



oh thats alright - you are allowed to rant!

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busymum View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote busymum Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 April 2008 at 4:37pm
Have you PMed AnnC? I think she had home help after a c/s. I didn't get offered any but I only had a c/s for #1 - not that that's not hard work with abdo surgery!!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Bombshell Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 April 2008 at 9:09pm
i wasnt offered any help...i had five days in hosp, felt pretty good when i came home and even braved the stairs (admittedly mostly only morn and night!!!) but by four weeks i was emailing Anil (spec) to beg him to say OK you can drive...I walked around botany a day or so after i came home, and by four weeks was driving there and back and walking around pushing stroller quite happily...slowly but out and about nonetheless....

I would have LOVED someone to step in and do washing etc etc....maybe next time (altho I know for a fact the amazing Ginger did offer to come do it to BSDH! and I am grateful for the offer)
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Bombshell View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Bombshell Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 April 2008 at 9:09pm
ok sounds awful - I meant "do it" as in housework! LOL!!!!
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busymum View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote busymum Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 April 2008 at 9:40pm
It's cause you said do it "to" BSDH instead of "for"
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