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rachie 13 
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 Posted: 19 May 2013 at 11:48am |
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Bobsta can i ask what the symptoms you had with Raynauds Syndrome and your breasts? Because i have been having problems with mine, they go white sometimes when pumping and then the milk wont come and they so sore at times.
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Bobsta
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Posted: 20 May 2013 at 8:13am |
Hugs to you Emma...your post is exactly how I have felt this past week so I assure you it's not just you. Love my wee darling to bits but it's damn hard being on call 24/7 and the men just don't quite get it. I too have a bit of envy going on as I miss being able to just up and go some where when I feel like it. If a friend sends a text to play a quick round of golf, or go for a quick beer, we can't just say yeah sure, meet you in 5!! But I realise it's hard for them to understand and he probably thinks it's easy being at home all day!! We had a big talk about it so he is starting to understand just how challenging it can be and I understand how it is for him too so we have a better appreciation for each other. I then went out Saturday morning to do some odd jobs and the groceries and it was just AWESOME to be out a few hours on my own. I might make Saturday morning grocery shopping on my own a regular thing!
Rach, where do I start?! Once I read about it I tested my boobs and highly recommend you do this too. After a feed, walk topless into a cold room. Then watch your nipples and make note of the sensations you feel and the colour changes. Then warm up by using a heated wheatbag, hot water bottle, or hot shower. If the sensations fades instantly and your nipples go back to looking normal I think it's a pretty sure sign it's Raynauds. The best way to describe the pain is a deep throbbing, stinging, achey and pain feeling in and around the boob. Sometimes it can be sharp pain too. Once I paid attention to it I noticed it would start in the nipple but very quickly move deep into the breast when there was the slightest chill in the air. The nipple will go white and in extreme cold purple!! I didn't notice this at all as most of the time it changes colour was when I had a bra on. The first time I picked up the colour change was when I got changed for bed and took my bra off that night (usually I keep it on). It was the morning after that I decided to keep searching until I found out what was going on as I just knew it wasn't normal to be in so much pain. I put up with it as long as I did as everyone said "it takes time to get used to the sensation of breastfeeding" but I just knew what I was feeling was not right, despite there being no information in any books under the breastfeeding problems chapters. For me it seems worse in one breast than the other, but it's definitely not pleasant in either. I found the pain comes after feeding rather than during the feed. For anyone with this, it can vary from mild to severe but if you read all this and it sounds like you...you don't have to put up with it. Go to your GP and get some Nifedipine. It's a medication used for high blood pressure but is used to treat Raynauds. Technically it's not recommended in breast feeding in NZ which is totally bizarre considering it's used to treat Raynauds in breastfeeding!!! There have been many medical studies about it so I have no problems taking it and both my midwife & GP said it is actually fine to take. Good luck, I hope this helps! 
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Me 34 Him 35 DD almost 2 years old and... Baby #2 on it's way!
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Speck8
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Posted: 20 May 2013 at 4:48pm |
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JCD - awesome to hear things are going well, yay!
Bobsta - OMG!!! How flippin annoying that you had to find that out for yourself from Google!!! Sometimes google really is a good thing ay, as well as trusting your gut instincts when you know something isn't right.
Emma - yay for self settling, there is nothing better than a bubs that self settles!
And yes the guys truly don't GET how hard it is being at home with bubs. Working is ten times easier!!! And being the milk machines that we are just makes it even harder. Even if we do pop out on the weekends, we're always conscious of when there next feed is and are they going to sleep for 2 hours before needing another feed or just 45mins - arghh!!! DH and I had a LOT of discussions/arguments about this last time round with DS1 but fortunately after 3 years he gets that he needs to ask me first before he goes out in the evening (I always say yes but it's nice for him to check in with me first in case I've had a horror day and really need him home) and he's pretty good at letting me get away for a couple of hours on the weekends to run errands, but of course I do always need to come back for feeds. I love breastfeeding but I also look forward to weaning. I did 9 months with DS1 so we'll see how I go this time.
Well I had a mini breakthrough. A friend (who has 3 kids of her own) came over last Wed and she is a Gina Ford follower, who people either love or hate, but she basically helped me get bubs to self settle and that has been A-MAZING!!! No more feeding to sleep, no more rocking to sleep, just sing a lullaby, wrap him up tight and say goodnight and he settles either straight away or within a few mins. Woo Hoo!
However I'm still figuring out how long to keep bubs up for at a time and what to do when he wakes in between sleep cycles. I always give him a few mins to resettle and then if he doesn't I get him up but I'm thinking I need to give him longer to resettle cos when I do get him up he's often cranky and tired. What do you girls do? In fact, I'd love to hear how a typical day goes for you all??
Also - I managed an outing with Josh in the frontpack!!! YAY! I realised I'd been putting him in there when he was overtired or unsettled so I tried putting him in during his awake time and he was great, he grizzled a few times but nothing major. Of course this outing was on a Wed when DS1 is in daycare as I'm still not brave enough to manage another outing with the 2 of them!!!
Love hearing from you ladies, keep up the good work, being a Mum is one of the toughest jobs in the world but also the most rewarding!!!
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emma_3335
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Posted: 20 May 2013 at 8:41pm |
Speck - mmm a typical day. Not sure there is one but little miss' routine has changed (improved) over the past few days so here goes. Ill start at bedtime...around 9pm she will go down for the night, she will usually sleep for 4-5 hours, up for feed and quick bum change if needed. I keep it dark and she usually stays half asleep and goes back down no prob. Although we can be up for anywhere from 20 mins to an hour. Depending on her hunger. If she is unsettled, it can be longer but this isn't often. Usually she will sleep another 3-4 hours. Around 5am my partner gets up for work and Ashley and I are usually up feeding too. We go back to bed and depending on the day, she will sleep another couple of hours or more. Sometimes this is in our bed with me. She will wake around 7am usually (although can be later!), depending on the night before. This is an awake time for her (after a feed) so I spend a couple of hours cuddling, jiggling, playing, her on the bouncer or play mat, etc while I try and get a coffee and breaky in. She will feed again after a couple of hours and have a decent nap. I shower and do housework where I can! We don't have a strict routine, I follow her cues. Some days she won't have another decent nap. Others she will after lunch for a couple of hours. Some days she just cat naps. Mornings and evenings she tends to feed a lot, more cluster feeds. My partner gets home around 5ish and after awake time and our tea, he bathes/showers her (every second day usually), I feed and we have a quiet time getting her to bed. I am feeding her now, and she will be in bed very soon. Like I said, we don't have a real routine. We go with the flow. I work around her and will do so until her feeds settle. Like tonight it feels like she has sucked me dry. Almost feel as though I have nothing left in there, which is unusual for me. I'm usually like a tap, filling breast pad after breast pad! She has fed all bloody night! And no decent nap since a car ride at lunchtime! Right, off to bed....look forward to your typical day stories! Night 
Edited by emma_3335 - 20 May 2013 at 8:44pm
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emma_3335
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Posted: 21 May 2013 at 3:50pm |
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Funny story ... I was just THAT first time mum at the supermarket. No it wasn't Ashley crying or making a fuss...it was me leaving my bloody wallet at home and not realising until at the checkout.
Luckily I only live five mins away, but meant I had to bundle bubba in the car again, go home, then take her back out and go back in to pay. The staff were awesome and helped me with my groceries to the car so that was cool. But man, what a major fail!
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Speck8
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Posted: 21 May 2013 at 4:15pm |
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Ohhh nooo Emma - kind of funny though! Glad you only live 5 mins away.
Wow your typical day is really interesting and good to hear. It's interesting that you can keep Ashley up for a couple of hours in the morning because Josh can stay up for about 1hr 30min max! Sometimes he can only manage 40 or 50 minutes!
Our typical day is a bit like this, though of course every day it changes:
7am-ish - wakes for the day, feeds, has a little play and then down by about 8-8:30am and will generally have a decent sleep here of 2 - 3hrs.
Then he'll be up again, fed and play for an hour or so in total and then down again. He might only sleep for 45mins at this next sleep but I try and get him to resettle and if he does he generally has another decent sleep. If he only sleeps for 45mins, he can't stay awake for as long and then needs to have another sleep.
Then he usually has a catnap in the afternoon of 30-45mins around 3ish.
From 4pm he cluster feeds and is a little unsettled so we do lots of feeding around this time. DH gets home around 5ish and baths Josh at 5:30pm and then he's down for the night at 6pm. He then wakes anywhere between 12 and 2 (although the other day it was 4am!!!). But last night it was 12:30am and then again at 5:15am.
He's really not up/awake for very long at all, especially since he's a fast feeder. Sometimes I think he sleeps too much but then again he's still pretty little.
I managed an outing to the park with both monkeys today, Josh slept beautifully in the buggy and DS1 had a good run around - yay!
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emma_3335
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Posted: 21 May 2013 at 4:45pm |
Thats also interesting reading Speck. Ashley can be awake for 2-3 hours quite happily and doesn't seem to get overtired or grizzly. She isn't a huge sleeper anymore! I failed to mention she also has a huge awake time in the evening. She is super awake and alert now and very strong. Had last MW visit today. Ashley has gained 300g in a week and is now 10lb 13oz! Wow... No longer little
Edited by emma_3335 - 21 May 2013 at 4:47pm
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Bobsta
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Posted: 22 May 2013 at 8:11am |
Sorry in advance this post ended up being quite
long.........
Interesting reading ladies! My routine is very much
like yours speck....
She usually goes down for her big sleep anywhere from 6.30-8pm (varies
depending on the day we've had)
She will sleep anywhere between 7 to 8.5 hours now (woohoo!)
I get up and do a feed and change of nappy - the time this takes has
significantly reduced to about 30 mins.
She goes back down no probs and I go back to bed and she will usually
sleep another 3.5 to 4 hours.
We wake anywhere from 6am to 7.30am and do another feed.
After that we have short cuddles and cuddles with dad before he goes to
work.
Then she's back in bed and she goes to sleep easily for another 2 hours
or so.
During this time I have my shower, breakfast, do a quick house tidy and
then enjoy some computer time. (basically do as much as possible!)
She wakes again for another feed any time from 9.30 to 10.30am.
After this feed we have active time which can be anywhere from 30mins to
an hour.
Then it’s bedtime again but takes more to settle her now as she’s going
through her 6 week growth spurt.
She used to sleep another 2 hours but now it’s more like an hour.
I will keep settling her by rocking if need be but I don’t pick her up
or talk to her, just making the shhhhh noise while I rock her.
She gets up for another feed around 1.30ish, give or take an hour. I
don’t do play time as it over stimulates her by this time of day so I just
spend time cuddling and soothing.
She starts getting more grizzly around this time when I try to put her
down again and will only catnap.
I’ll get her up again when she is getting too grizzly to settle or
catnap and this is usually around 3.30ish.
It’s a feed then bed as really grizzly, tired and gassy by this stage.
It’s constant settling and cat napping for the next wee while.
I get her up again around 5pmish. She will stay up until bedtime at this
point.
We do feeding, cuddle/soothing, shower with dad, massage, feeding,
soothing etc.
She then goes to sleep and is out like a light!
Phew! I’m tired just reading this lol! Was great to actually write it
out as I haven’t really thought much about our routine.
Naturally it varies slightly but I would say that’s our main routine.
She’s changed her day sleeping since she started her growth spurt so is no
longer the perfect day sleeper that she was. But she has increased her night
sleeping so I don’t mind so much. Apparently she will settle down again once
this phase passes.
Although it’s recommended to have play at each waking time during the
day, I found she started getting way too overstimulated so have cut it back to
once a day and do it in the morning when she is alert and happy. It’s a great
time for tummy time and lots of smiles!
I met my plunket nurse yesterday for the first time and she recommended
once she is awake, aim to have her down again in an hours time. So that hour
includes feeding, nappy change, burping, cuddles and then 5 mins wind down time
before bed again. I tried that yesterday afternoon and it was much much better
so I’m sticking with that for awhile as I really think it’s too soon for her to
have much play time, she seems to be a baby that likes (and needs) her sleep.
Edited by Bobsta - 22 May 2013 at 8:15am
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Bobsta
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Posted: 22 May 2013 at 8:23am |
 Speck8 wrote:
Well I had a mini breakthrough. A friend (who has 3 kids of her own) came over last Wed and she is a Gina Ford follower, who people either love or hate, but she basically helped me get bubs to self settle and that has been A-MAZING!!! No more feeding to sleep, no more rocking to sleep, just sing a lullaby, wrap him up tight and say goodnight and he settles either straight away or within a few mins. Woo Hoo!
However I'm still figuring out how long to keep bubs up for at a time and what to do when he wakes in between sleep cycles. I always give him a few mins to resettle and then if he doesn't I get him up but I'm thinking I need to give him longer to resettle cos when I do get him up he's often cranky and tired. What do you girls do? In fact, I'd love to hear how a typical day goes for you all??
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I'm intrigued so will look up Gina Ford, thanks for passing that on Speck! My day would be perfect if I could just get her back to sleeping a proper 2 hours at each nap during the day like she was doing being her growth spurt. In terms of when I get bubs up...in the morning it's easy as she settles herself and when she wakes it's a proper wakeup because she's hungry. But in the afternoon I keep her in bed for at least two sleep cycles and will rock her in between to settle her if she doesn't do it on her own. I try to keep her in bed for 2 hours at a time but as I'm sure your aware, sometimes that's a battle not worth fighting!
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Me 34 Him 35 DD almost 2 years old and... Baby #2 on it's way!
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emma_3335
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Posted: 22 May 2013 at 11:16am |
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Thanks for sharing Bobsta. Now after reading your two stories, I feel like Ashley is awake too much! But it seems it work for her. She hardly ever has trouble going down and is sleeping well when she is asleep. Her day naps can vary from 30mins to 2-3 hours so totally depends on the day. Nights are getting better too. Se hardly ever cries...real cries and isn't a grizzly bum very often.
She almost seems to get bored if we don't play or talk, etc mornings and early evening. The midwife and Plunket nurse are very happy so I guess I'll continue with this....
It's such a guessing game isn't it!
Edited by emma_3335 - 22 May 2013 at 11:20am
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Bobsta
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Posted: 22 May 2013 at 11:26am |
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Definitely go with what is working Emma!!!! All babies are individuals and like/dislike different things so some may like play time more than others at this stage and some prefer quiet sleep time. There is no right or wrong!
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Me 34 Him 35 DD almost 2 years old and... Baby #2 on it's way!
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Speck8
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Posted: 22 May 2013 at 12:33pm |
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Really interesting reading ladies - JCD, would be keen to hear what your days are like too.
Bobsta - I haven't got Gina's book (The Contented Little Baby) but if you mention her to anyone they will either tell you she's cruel and to stay well clear of her OR they love her. Basically she sets out a pretty strict routine of sleep times and feed times and you have to wake your baby up etc etc. I thought about following it but have decided not to as Josh is settling in to his own routine. The one thing that my friend helped me achieve (and which Gina advocates) is self settling, which is really exactly the same as what Kathy Fray says in the Oh Baby book. I do wake Josh if he's been asleep for 3 - 3.5hrs but other than that, I figure, let him sleep!!!
Josh woke between sleep cycles during yesterday's midday sleep and I was busy putting DS1 to bed so I just left him, he grizzled on and off for 15mins or so and then went back to sleep and had another big sleep - yay!!
We are off to see the Child Health Nurse for Josh's 6 week check up today (can't believe he's 6 weeks already!!), can't wait to have him weighed.
Ahhh Wednesdays are soooo nice, peace and quiet. DS1 is in daycare and Josh is asleep. Is so nice to be able to catch up on paying bills and cleaning and things. Happy Hump Day girls =)
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emma_3335
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Posted: 22 May 2013 at 1:49pm |
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Thanks Bobsta. It's so hard to know!
Speck - if I leave Ashley for 10 or so mins between sleep cycles, she will usually go back to sleep. Other times I probably rush in too quickly and that's my own fault.
I think all of us are doing a pretty amazing job :) hard to think a few weeks ago we were all big fat bellied ladies and our wee ones actually fit inside us!
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Bobsta
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Posted: 22 May 2013 at 7:39pm |
No problem Emma, you are doing fantastic!  Speck I did read up on Gina Ford but must admit did not like what I read...the main thing that put me off was that she is not a mother herself so hasn't experienced all the baby stuff first hand. Lili is so good 95% of the time and it's mainly settling her to sleep during the day I want to read about more, so I think I will get out the Kathy Fray book from the library. All this talk about routines got me thinking so I actually recorded everything we did today. Here it is if your interested.... 7.30am Feed
& cuddle.
8.15am Sleep:
went down to sleep straight away.
9.30am Feed,
cuddle, skyped mum & dad, feed.
10.15am Sleep:
5mins of swaying/shhhing then in bed, was drowsy & settled by herself.
11.30am Woke
up but didn’t self-settle, rocked bassinet for 5 mins.
11.35am Moderate
crying while in bassinet, did not go in.
11.45am Crying
intensified so got her up. Feed, cuddle, tummy time, cuddle, feed.
12.45pm Sleep:
Slept in car seat while I did odd jobs in town.
2.15pm Put
car seat in lounge, crying after few mins but went back to sleep after rocking.
2.55pm Feed,
cuddle, tummy time, play time, cuddle, feed, cuddle, feed.
3.55pm Sleep:
short grizzles on and off for 25 mins then settled to sleep on her own.
6pm Woke
her up: Feed, shower, massage, cuddle, feed, cuddle, feed.
7.20pm Sleep:
Went straight to sleep on her own.
She was particularly settled today and even had a really good deep sleep late this afternoon which we haven't managed to achieve in about a week!
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emma_3335
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Posted: 22 May 2013 at 11:09pm |
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That's funny that you recorded the day, I have done the same but have had a bad night so far...
I'm going to record a couple of dsys and see what's really happening.
Night :)
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Bobsta
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Posted: 23 May 2013 at 5:22am |
Hopefully you've managed some good sleep by now Emma.
Lili is 6 weeks as of 2.43am today!!!!  Although Lili had a such a good day yesterday, she's been up twice in the night instead of just the once. Only slept 5.5hours then another 3.5. I know that's amazing for a 6 week old but I've gotten used to getting up just the once the past week. Nevermind, we can't have it all! My boobs are so so much better as I only get sore now at the middle of the night feeds. Still need to use the wheatbag for those ones but at least the medication seems to be kicking in a bit more now.
Right, back to bed for me. Night night.
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emma_3335
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Posted: 24 May 2013 at 9:15am |
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What a day Wednesday was. Think it was the hardest 24 hours so far. There were tears from me and her, Ashley wouldn't settle or sleep. She only had 12 hours sleep in the 24 hours I recorded. I tried everything.
BUT last night was much better. Back to what we are used to with two wakings and straight back to sleep on her own. Phew. and she has really taken to being swaddled. I hadn't tried it before as she always slept happily with her arms above her head, but it works. I also had to pull out the dummy that terrible day, so that helped too.
I have also been putting her down a bit sooner, and once I recorded a couple of days, I noticed that she isn't actually staying up 2-3 hours, more like 1-2 hours. It's easy to forget exact times when it's not written down. So I'm finding writing it down helps!
Bobsta - yay for Lili being 6 weeks. That's so cool. Time flies aye. And you are very lucky to have her only wake once in the night. Although I can't complain, I only usually get up twice...I have friends who are up most of the night, every night!!!
I have Ashley's six week check next Friday and my partner has taken a few days off since he went back to work soon after her birth...so lucky him gets to come with me :)
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Speck8
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Posted: 24 May 2013 at 11:27am |
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Hey ladies,
Cool that you recorded everything Bobsta, is interesting to reflect back ay. I kept a book with DS1 for all feed and sleep times and how long to settle etc up to about 4 months! I have even brought it out again this time round to look back on but fortunately Josh is 10 times better than DS1 was.
Eecck for a tough day Emma, but fab to hear you have made a few discoveries. I swear by swaddling and white noise. I have Josh in a miracle blanket as he is such a little wriggler and wriggles out of normal wraps but the miracle blanket does the trick.
I think self settling is the most amazing skill we can teach our little bubbas and although it is hard, it is MUCH easier to do it when they're younger than when they're older. When they're older their cries are louder, they produce real tears and it takes longer. I just pop Josh into bed, swaddled, play white noise, shut the curtains and leave him to it and he goes down great. Sometimes he cries a tired/protesting cry for a few mins but that's it. Yesterday he woke between sleep cycles a bit and I gave him 15mins or so but ended up getting him up cos my SIL was over and wanted cuddles, but then he would often fall asleep on me so I KNOW I needed to leave him for longer. Will do that today.
Josh had his 6 week check up and is now 5.3kg and 58.5cm. Our babies are growing so fast, before we know it they'll be rolling, sitting up and crawling and they won't be little babies anymore. I really am trying to appreciate this stage so much more, especially as he is our last.
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Bobsta
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Posted: 24 May 2013 at 2:10pm |
Hugs Emma. It can be so hard sometimes. It sounds like Ashley might be starting her 6 week growth spurt early. Lili started hers at 5.2 weeks and it took a good 4-5 days for her to settle down again. At one point she fed/sucked on and off for 5 hours straight!!! As with everything, it will pass and Ashley will settle down again.
Speck those miracle blankets are awesome aye! We have one and I swear by it. I use it for every sleep, day & night, and it's just brilliant. They can be such little Houdini's so it's much better than swaddling with just a square bit of cloth.
Lili was 6 weeks yesterday and had her 6 week vaccinations. Boy did she go red and scream!!! Luckily she settled within a few minutes and I was able to give her a feed straight away so she even smiled at the nurse as we were leaving lol.
Well I'm going to go enjoy the peace and quiet now and I've just lit the fire so it's nice and cosy too 
Have a lovely afternoon ladies  |
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Mrs JCD
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Posted: 25 May 2013 at 1:07pm |
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Hello!
Just a quick note, as I'm due for feeding any moment now.
We have had quite a few weeks! Posterior tongue tie and upper lip tie snipped by laser, lactation consultant visits (great new hold which is proving fantastic, but I still have some nipple pain so loving the nipple shields - may be using them permanently), Plunket visit yesterday (9.2 pounds and 55cm tall now!), checking out a lump on my breast (lactation nodule, nothing to worry about but definitely not a blocked milk duct as everyone thought), parenting class with my coffee group and trying to squeeze in friend/family visits. Phew!
We're giving Lara heaps more activity time now, which seems to be helping her stay more settled during the day. Don't let anyone make you feel guilty about using a dummy - they are wonders when nothing else works! She's still sleeping amazingly through the night, and we are following a 4 hour routine, which seems to be going really well (fingers crossed!)
One week today until we fly out for the US - oh my goodness, I'm so not ready!
One question for you lovely ladies - do you incorporate activity time only after feeds, or instead as part-way between feeds (which is when we do our nappy change)?
And did you use Pamol after their jabs? Lara is getting her ones next week.
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April 2013 Babies
