How is everyone coping?

Babe wrote: Oops sorry serial quoting too hard to stick it all on one post!

Lol! We don't mind chickie, quote away!

sierra34 wrote: LA did you get tired when preg with bub #1? I know I did and it wasn't depression for me then, it was the growing of bub! Plus you haved one already to run after so I assume it is quite exhausting. Hopefully that's all it is, and are you able to get out and visit a friend this week sometime, i'm sure it will help if you have something/somewhere to look forward to going, if you're feeling stuck with the in-laws.

yes I was very tired when pregnant with DD as well. my iron levels have been low for 6 months now also, so that is not helping. I am over taking 3 ferritin tabs a day though, so have just called my GP to see if I can get the injection.

And on another note, I can no longer put DD in daycare as DH has just reduced my allowance because things with the house are going over budget

Sorry to see you here Heaf but yay for getting support from these lovely ladies and your GP.

Wiggly_jiggly how much were you on before they cut your dosage? I've just been increased to 225mg venlafaxine and so far not feeling any different. Only been a week tho so have to be patient I guess.

I just keep having this overwhelming feeling that DS would be better off with his dad looking after him than me, he does such a better job and DS responds to him so much more positively. All he seems to do with me is cry and I hate seeing him like that. I hate feeling so anxious and am sooo frustrated coz a week ago I was feeling great, it's like flicking a switch and all of a sudden I'm not "me" any more, the bubbly sociable person I usually am.

Helps to see the success stories in here, those of you who got through this and are going back for no. 2 or more! Gives me hope that this will pass...

Maybe we should create a private facebook group for ohbaby PND ladies? I know there was one in the past but it's not active anymore. Im happy to make one- I have some of you on my facebook but not all, so if I don't please PM me and I can add you.

Anja, I couldn't see it at the beginning but people used to tell me that baby feeds off your mood, so if you're anxious, they are anxious, if you're upset or tense so are they. I hated hearing that in the beginning but now I can totally see it, if I'm upset or tense or having an off day, DS totally responds to it. I've been sick recently and he's really played up and been clingy, like he senses something is wrong. Whenever my Mum would come over in the early days when I'd had a terrible night with the baby and felt I couldn't cope, he would always calm down immediately for her and it used to make me so sad, but now I see why. Perhaps your DS is settling better for DH because he's feeling calmer? Try not to take it personally and try to remember it's a product of the situation and in time when you feel better it will start to change. My DS and I are so close now because of all we've been through together and I feel we have a special bond but it wasn't always that way. Even now I find if he won't settle to sleep and I get frustrated and have a bit of a meltdown, if DH goes in and is calm, the baby will sleep, or at least calm down until Im ready to come back and get him to sleep. Your DS will never be better off without you.

RE the dose, I have been on loxamine since January. I started on 1 tablet, increased to 2 then that was good for ages, increased to 3 after a rough time but that was too much, dropped down to 2 again then that's been fine for ages, then trialled just having 1 this week. I decided to drop it rather than the doctor but she said last time it changed she was happy for me to move between the 2 and 1 pill dose when I felt ready.

Heaf, chatting to your GP is a good idea. When I did it I cried but she was so supportive and made me feel so much better and gave me some hope that I could get through it. That was in January and it's been a long hard road since then but if I hadn't done it, I don't know how much longer and harder the road would have been, and Im glad I did. Its hard but you can do it. Take your DH with you so he can hear and understand some of what you are feeling, I find that's important so they don't take the angry or sad outbursts too personally.

You bring up a good point about the anger, I was going to ask about that myself today. I had been feeling good on my dropped dose but in the last few days DS has been waking at night and difficult and I've just felt so frustrated and angry, and also tearful which I haven't felt (the tearful bit) since being on antidepressants. Does this mean I should put my dose back up, seeing as Im feeling worse again? Or just keep soldiering on through it? I am always confused about the anger- is it PND or am I just that sort of person (I never used to be believe me!). It scares me sometimes and I always feel sooo bad after it, I never mean to growl at him but somehow it comes out in the moment... makes me feel like the worst mother, I wish I didn't do it. I hadn't done it for a while, and now it's coincided with dropping the pills so I don't know whether that's to blame or not. Hope that makes sense.

I am feeling a bit deflated because I felt like I was so ready to drop the dose and then to have these things come back makes me sad because myabe I haven't come as far as I thought I had.

Heaf, feelings of anger is normal, but it does make us feel even worse about ourselves afterwards. I lose it at DD at times, particularly when she is crying and upset. Talk to your doctor and see what they have to say. Otherwise, how much time out from DD are you getting?

Anja, do you have any outside support? I can't imagine looking after a baby on my own, it wouldn't be safe for either one of us. You will get through it though, the first 9 months are definitely the hardest and least rewarding, but it gets better I promise *hugs*

I've made the group now.

Just P.M me on here and I'll add you. Not sure if you can request to be added, as I made it a secret group. So maybe just let me know your FB email and name or I can just give you mine, so I can add you that way.

I've added wiggly_jiggly and LA so far.

Edited by escadachic

Oh and chicken pox vaccine is $80 - had C done about a month ago. It doesn't last forever, they need a booster around 18, but in my mind, totally worth it!!

Tired and irritable today, so over DD and her teething=waking multiple times a night screaming and taking an hour to resettle. I try to nap when she does in the morning but i'm usually just falling asleep when she's deciding to wake up :( Hate living with the inlaws too and having MIL being privvy to how i'm coping (or lack thereof!!).

argh i wrote a post on here the other day but it obviously didn't work. and now i can't remember what i said lol.

the prob with H's sleeping is not so much at night time, although she doesn't go to bed until late, but its the day sleeps or lack of...the only place she will sleep at the moment is in my arms and thats after a feed. as soon as i try to pop her in bed she wakes up and won't go back to sleep. finding it so unbelievably frustrating right now! and she doesnt' go to sleep at night until like 11.

so yeah, no naps for me in the day time! which most of the time is fine, but some days i would kill for a bit more sleep.

thanks for setting up the FB group, going to have a lookie now.

I'm not sure LA...but I definately need something like that, or even someone to come over and help me do it at home,i just don't know what i'm doing wrong or how to fix it.