They've given me a run down of how it will all go today. I feel sick about it. My husband doesn't want to be in the room when they do it which I can understand..I'll be sedated, he won't be.
I have a beautiful friend that is psychic and does reiki. I asked her to come over yesterday and my experience was incredible. I felt at peace for many hours and she's also given me a specially formulated rescue remedy to keep me going.
Hubby and I lay together in bed last night feeling our baby move. It was odd to be smiling at that time which then made me sad again I've been awake since 3am and have been writing letters to my baby. My parents arrived yesterday and they will be looking after our son today when we go to Auckland
6 MC angels DS born 04.01.14 DD born sleeping 09.05.16 22w5d
Today will be hard for sure RD. I was sedated too and it helped my calm right down. I just made myself go to another place in my head. My mum was with me but DH wasn't and that was ok. I'm glad you're doing things to help you with the grief at the moment. Letters to your baby sound lovely. Will be thinking of you Hun xxx
TTC since Oct 2009 4 x DI's failed IVF1 CP & MC IVF2 CP IVF3 Angel baby born 22.3wks
Thinking if you both today RD, letters to your baby are a perfect way to help. I brought a beautiful glass box which I have my letters in, it reflects so much light around my bedroom when the sun shines. Glad you have support for today xx
The toughest day so far. Our baby passed away at 245pm this afternoon. I wish I was more sedated. My body was relaxed but I was really alert. They put the local anaesthetic in then I was waiting for the next bit (had my eyes closed) then suddenly the doc touched my shoulder and said it was done. It was so quick with no real pain just some yucky sensations. The whole ordeal was so extremely difficult. My husband finally broke down. I knew he was holding back for so long so he really needed to have a good cry. Together we've been quite strong I believe. Oddly feeling sort of ok right now. So Tired and truly heartbroken but ok.
6 MC angels DS born 04.01.14 DD born sleeping 09.05.16 22w5d
Huge hugs RD. One of the worst parts is over. I'm glad it went quickly. I was alert too despite sedation but they took an age to do it which wasn't great. It's a good thing your DH has cried and not continued to hold it back. You are strong Hun and keep telling yourself that. Have you got some thing to distract you this weekend? We were in Wellington as live miles away so mum and I visited Te papa and had a look around although I must admit I was buggered and just wanted to curl up in our motel. Strangely I occupied my time with a crossword it helped keep my mind busy. Will be thinking of you over the next while xx
TTC since Oct 2009 4 x DI's failed IVF1 CP & MC IVF2 CP IVF3 Angel baby born 22.3wks
We've made some.plans to go.to the Cambridge bike track with my parents and DS. We'll plan to do something else tomorrow to. Thankfully we're due at hospital first thing monday. We'll be contacting the Angel Casts ppl today as well as making some funeral plans
Edited by LP pka Rainyday - 07 May 2016 at 6:53am
6 MC angels DS born 04.01.14 DD born sleeping 09.05.16 22w5d
RD, I can imagine the sense of relief at hubby crying its really hard to understand greif and you both will move through it in different ways and at a different pace. Hopefully when Monday comes you will both be ready for the next part of this journey. Sometimes having the odd app on ph or ipad like who wants to be a millionaire and logo games etc are a good way to keep your minds busy while waiting for things to start happening on Monday. Xx
RD I hope today provided much needed distraction. They couldn't get hold of the casting ppl for us which was a shame because I'd have like a casting of her feet. I did end up getting her footprints imprinted on a necklace though - something I treasure very much now.
TTC since Oct 2009 4 x DI's failed IVF1 CP & MC IVF2 CP IVF3 Angel baby born 22.3wks
I actually enjoyed our outing yesterday morning. Went to the cemetery in the afternoon which helped us decide what to do with baby..we've decided to bury on the Kowhai lawn at newstead which is reserved for stillborn bubbas. I've made contact with Angel Casts and a Heartfelt (professional) photographer. Feels strangely good to get our ducks in a row. But surreal at the same time Took a sleeping pill last night sort of helped but didn't knock me out that we'll. Lots of tightentings since yesterday arvo and have had some really strong ones since but not painful. Feeling quite uncomfortable this morning. Sore back and generally achy uterus.
Edited by LP pka Rainyday - 08 May 2016 at 8:29am
6 MC angels DS born 04.01.14 DD born sleeping 09.05.16 22w5d
I'm glad yesterday was a good day. Heartfelt do amazing photos. Will they be able to come soon after baby arrives? Ours didn't come until the next day and I wish she'd been able to come sooner but not to worry. Hope the pain doesn't get too bad today.
TTC since Oct 2009 4 x DI's failed IVF1 CP & MC IVF2 CP IVF3 Angel baby born 22.3wks
RD I guess so although it was the first time for me so I didn't know what to expect. I think i had contractions between the procedure and being induced (memory is a bit hazy). On the day I was induced they gave me the first lot of pills and within 1.5hrs I was getting quite strong period pain and asked for Panadol which did nothing. Then had voltaren which helped me relax. Then had next lot of pills and after that it was all on. I got regular contractions that blimming hurt and by the time the next pills time came I was about to have her - so 6 hrs from start to finish. From what I understand I went through the same stages of labour the other difference being I only had to dialate to her head size. If you're feeling like labours coming on I'd contact your midwife, especially if you've had a baby before. And most certainly if your waters break which you'll know to do anyway. From memory they said because I'd had 2x d&c my cervix knew what to do, at least I think that's what they meant so next time I give birth it won't be a long labour.
TTC since Oct 2009 4 x DI's failed IVF1 CP & MC IVF2 CP IVF3 Angel baby born 22.3wks
830 last night things started getting regular..not painful but strong and regular contractions. MW suggested going into hospital. Been here since 10pm They've got us relatively comfortable in our own room and while I've had some more really strong contractions things have slowed down but I know they are progressing. They'll check me in a few hours to see how I'm going and if I need the next meds to move things along. I've been dozing since the hospital mw finished doing her things and we've had our mw visit then go home to rest I'm ready to meet this little one
Edited by LP pka Rainyday - 09 May 2016 at 4:32am
6 MC angels DS born 04.01.14 DD born sleeping 09.05.16 22w5d
Big hugs RD. Today will be hard but also special too as you get to meet your precious baby. I found having her a relief and no where near as hard as the procedure. All the best xx
TTC since Oct 2009 4 x DI's failed IVF1 CP & MC IVF2 CP IVF3 Angel baby born 22.3wks
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