Yep, I went on for a few years and another baby and although I am preg again and feeling a lot better I still have really rough days and I think I still grieve the time that I "missed" when the girls were young. I was lucky enough to get onto the waiting list for MMH in christchurch at PMH and have an assesment appoitment this month because I don't want to end up back down so low again.
Maybe you need to to get your meds looked at, you hay have hit a plateau and need something extra or different?
I hope things get better for you soon as it is nice to see things in colour again and have more good days than bad - its a great feeling!!!