am i a bad mum ???
Printed From: OHbaby!
Category: Support
Forum Name: Living with Post Natal Depression
Forum Description: Around one in ten NZ mothers will be diagnosed with PND in the first year of their babies life. Find support and encouragement and share ideas for coping here.
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=20950
Printed Date: 12 May 2024 at 7:43am
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Topic: am i a bad mum ???
Posted By: chonni
Subject: am i a bad mum ???
Date Posted: 15 September 2008 at 9:23pm
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i was on anti depressnts for a while but ii stoped taking them because i was feeling much better and i hate taking pills and i gag every time i do... but for the past two or three weeks im feeling like i dont like or love mila anymore ( i know what kinda mother does that!!!!) shes just so frustrating because her exzema and crys all the time and iches i dont know whet to do when she like that and when i have to change her nappy its like a war to stop her from itching and i have to do it alone most of the time i feel like braking down every time. i havint told anyone alce this because i know how bad it sounds and i know my mum would just think im being stupid and that im just feeling sorry for my self!! any advise would be great thank you ------------- 
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Replies:
Posted By: FionaS
Date Posted: 15 September 2008 at 9:27pm
Good on you for speaking up. Being upset and struggling does not make you a bad mum. It sounds like a tough time for you. Is there someone IRL you can share this with who can support you? Maybe consider going back and chatting to your doctor too. ------------- Mummy to Gabrielle and Ashley |
Posted By: Kels
Date Posted: 15 September 2008 at 9:35pm
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Aww huge hugs huns. You are defintely not alone and having those feelings hun. Sounds like a trip back to the Gp for a chat is a good idea. Sorry to hear about Mila eczema being so bad. I really hope it becomes easy to control as she gets older. Take care and again huge cyber hugs coming your way! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
Busy mum to Miss 15yrs, Miss 10yrs and Master 4yrs |
Posted By: chonni
Date Posted: 15 September 2008 at 9:44pm
thanks yeah i think i do need to go back down to see my gp but its hard because my mum works down at the med centre as a nurse  i thought i could come off of them because last time my deperssion was mainly a compolsion where i couldint eat and i thought all food was old and bad to eat and could only eat take aways and i was really tired it was never like this, hopfully i can keep going with the pills this time, thanks for being understanding i thought everyone would think i was a bad mum  i just wish i could speek to my mum-------------
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Posted By: BaAsKa
Date Posted: 16 September 2008 at 1:11pm
i have been in this situation before - i had depression after having Bailey and i was so afraid to tell anyone! and i still feel stupid telling anyone! but when i tell people who were around when i first had Bay they generally say that they already knew! because i would never leave the house, i would never pull my curtains, nor clean my house etc!.
I let it go to far past the stage of 'not getting on' with my child and i now have alot of struggles with Bailey 4years later!!! - i still dont feel like he is my child! so good on you! for doing something about it! and i definately dont think you are a bad mum for thinking that!
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Posted By: kezplanet
Date Posted: 18 September 2008 at 12:26am
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I don't think you are a bad mum but I do think you are a SAD mum and it sounds like you need someone to talk to that you trust and you won't feel judged by. Are there days that your mum isn't at the centre? I'm sorry you are feeling this way. ------------- Kerryn, Mum to Ashlyn(29/3/04), Anastasia(1/11/05) & Abigail (24/02/09) |
Posted By: chonni
Date Posted: 29 September 2008 at 9:36am
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hey ive got my docs appt today im hoping she wont tell me off for stoping my pills! nothing is getting better ive had two breaks since my last post, im happy when im out mut as soon as i know ive got to go home i get bad again and milas all happy with her dad but as soon as i walk in the door all she does is cry untill shes in bed!! -------------
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Posted By: kezplanet
Date Posted: 29 September 2008 at 10:04am
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Good luck for today and I'm sure your Dr wont tell you off for not taking your pills, she may say that for the moment you need to keep taking them tho. I am also going to the dr today to get a plan in place for when I have this wee one, there is a 6 mth waiting time for maternal mental health or something here. I don't want to have to go back on meds at the moment as they recommend coming off before having baby then going back on after which I will avoid if I can but I am prepared to go back on pills after if need be. I understand being fine away from the stress and sometimes even the thought of going back into it all seems too much. Let us know how you go ... ------------- Kerryn, Mum to Ashlyn(29/3/04), Anastasia(1/11/05) & Abigail (24/02/09) |
Posted By: Andie
Date Posted: 29 September 2008 at 3:03pm
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Good on ya for booking in with the Doc. And if they advise you to go back on the meds then go back on the meds, girl!!! Lots of people stop taking them for different reasons, so you sure won't be the first person they've seen who stopped them only to find it didn't work out so well. Hey, one way to find out, right? It's a tricky thing to predict, so don't beat yourself up about it - I guess you had to stop them to know how it'd go, and some time further down the track, you'll probably stop them and find it works great for you. Hang in there, and no, you're not a bad mum!! ------------- Andie |
Posted By: Bobbie
Date Posted: 29 September 2008 at 3:45pm
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I hope your appointment goes well. -------------  
 
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Posted By: mummy_becks
Date Posted: 01 October 2008 at 12:40pm
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How did your appointment end up going??? ------------- I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived! |