On the Downhill
Printed From: OHbaby!
Category: Support
Forum Name: Living with Post Natal Depression
Forum Description: Around one in ten NZ mothers will be diagnosed with PND in the first year of their babies life. Find support and encouragement and share ideas for coping here.
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=27175
Printed Date: 12 May 2024 at 7:57pm
Software Version: Web Wiz Forums 12.05 - http://www.webwizforums.com
Topic: On the Downhill
Posted By: MissAngel
Subject: On the Downhill
Date Posted: 26 June 2009 at 3:44pm
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Oh boy have I been avoiding posting this.
Right, so I need to vent - I've pretty much come to the end of my rope here with stuff, and not being able to find a free councellor is just adding insult to injury. I dont qualify for anything from WINZ - hubby earns too much, not that we have any money LOL. So anyway, yea as the title says, things are on the downhill for me at the moment. I've been getting less and less affectionate/feeling like a good mum for a while now and I almost walked out on everyone on wednesday. I've had enough, I dont want to be a mum/wife anymore and I want to go back to the way it was BEFORE Thomas came along. I'm sick to death of people telling me how horrid and selfish I am - I CANT HELP IT ffs.. I hate how people judge. I have a mental problem - i'm not being an asshole on purpose. Everyones 'fix-it' solution to the problem is to take pills and it will all go away. Rubbish it will - the pills will mask it, make me feel like sh*t and i'll go mental from that instead! What the hell am I supposed to do? I cant afford $48 an hour for some suit behind a desk to click his pen and mumble incoherantly while I babble on about how it's the same crap everyday and i'm sick of it. TBH theres other things I'd rather spend $48 on anyway. So ladies of OB - What do I do? Do I grow a pair and take pills or do I pay money for a councellor which I dont think will work at all? Note: Prozac is a placebo, as is it's counterpart Loxamine, I know it wont work, so theres no point taking it. Aropax are far too addictive and amitriptaline put me to sleep! I hate medication. I'd be better off smoking a joint to calm me down I think! Not that I can afford that either lol. This really sucks. If only it was an actual visible problem so people could see you werent faking it. ------------- Alex, Thomas and Lily http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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Replies:
Posted By: AzzaNZ
Date Posted: 26 June 2009 at 4:30pm
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(((HUGS)))
If you're suffering from PND then its a hormonal imbalance and while counselling might help you understand it better my understanding is that it wont alleviate it. Is there any way your doctor could find medication that would work for you? I was on Cipralex which made me a little nauseous for the first week but worked like a charm after that. It didnt make me see rainbows and unicorns but it took the edge off my anxiety and the feeling of being overwhelmed. I was able to wean myself off it easily when I felt I could cope on my own. |
Posted By: Babe
Date Posted: 28 June 2009 at 12:14pm
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I'm on citalopram after a year and a half of being refused meds, being counselled & psychologised, and eventually going nuts.
3 days after being on the meds I was a different person. I'm totally sympathetic to how you're feeling but I think it gets to a point where you have to try everything you possibly can before your life completely falls in round your ears and you end up losing the relationships you have. Thats my opinion from my experience. I really hope you find something that works for you hun xx -------------   
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Posted By: YvetteandElla
Date Posted: 28 June 2009 at 4:51pm
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Big hugs hun, it is a very hard thing to go through and people who are telling you that you are selfish need a good kick up the bum.
I have suffered Depression and Anxiety for almost 7 years and have been on every type of drug possible. The thing I found the best was to see a psychiatrist (rather than a doctor) who will prescribe you the best antidepressant if needed followed on by seeing a therapist. I found this changed my life there were both biochemical issues and other personal underlying issues which were resolved. However I did go on to suffer PND it was easier to deal with and I went through the steps again I am on a high level of Citalopram Although it is hard to pay the money it is well worth it ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: palomino
Date Posted: 28 June 2009 at 4:57pm
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Similar to Babe, i tried for as long as i could to get better by myself. im now on meds and it has changed my outlook on everything. I had turned in to a total bitch to my DP and i didnt really appreciate my wee boy. The pills arent masking anything i dont belive in my case, Iv had problems with depression all my life and sometimes i just need a helping hand. Normally 3months or so then i can wean my self off them and im fine. It had been 4years since i last needed them and i guess giving birth etc just unbalanced my chemicals.
Now im back to my pre pregnancy happy self (well most of the time lol) for now anyway. Im no longer pushing DP away and im enjoying being a mum more and more and not wishing he would sleep etc... what a ramble, just wanted to say not all pills are bad. And re talking to someone, do you have a close friend? A cup of coffees a bit cheaper than a counciller. Or post away in here, we all need to vent now and again! |
Posted By: MissAngel
Date Posted: 29 June 2009 at 12:01am
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thanks girls.
I think half of my problem is I dont have a friend I can have a coffee with etc. I dont know anyone in this stupid little town except for the girls in my coffee group - and i've tried talking to them, but they dont seem interested. What we've decided is, i'm going on holiday by myself to Sydney for a week and a half to chill out, go shopping, see friends etc and when I come back I'll be going to see a psych to sort out something. I think if I dont do this holiday then I'm probably going to walk out - which I dont want. I'll see how it goes. ------------- Alex, Thomas and Lily http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">
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Posted By: AzzaNZ
Date Posted: 29 June 2009 at 8:50am
| I think a bit of a break is a great idea - i hope you feel better with some space. |
Posted By: Muz
Date Posted: 14 July 2009 at 8:36am
I might be a bit naieve - but can someone tell me is Prozac really a placebo???? Isnt prozac another name for fluoxetine??? I hope your time in sydney helps you sort a few things out - would love to do the same thing!! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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MissAngel wrote: