Being a SAHM

How do you feel about being a SAHM?

I am a SAHM and my DD is nearly one (OMG!) anyways I feel almost like I hate saying I am a SAHM now that DD is reaching one as most people's reactions (normally other Mum's) are either "Well aren't you lucky to be able to do that" or "How do you do it? I would go insane, don't you want to do something with your life?" If it is someone older (50's - 60's) they are very supportive of it but otherwise I just feel the feedback is so negative.

I love being at home with my daughter and hope to be able to do so for much longer and hopefully have number 2 and be home with them as well. I do not do it because we can afford to, we have made sacrifices for me to be at home I do it because I love it and DD loves it too, she has plenty of interaction with other children and adults and we are always doing new things as well.

I would just like to know what other SAHM's think/feel and have you experienced the same kind of reactions?

Oh and don't get me wrong I don't have anything against Mums who work just don't understand the negativeness towards SAHM's.

To be honest some days it does my head in! I was in a job that I had a lot of control over and it was easy to find answers, there were shade of grey but alot of black and white. As mum I find that nothing is black and white and everything is a million shades of grey, and don't tell my kids but it often feels like I have no control!

In saying that though I couldn't be anything other than a SAHM. I love my boys and love being home with them, plus my mum was a SAHM so it is what is 'normal' for me

Although we have made some sacrifices we have been lucky that DH earns enough that we are comfortable and are even managing to extend our house although he is doing all the work. I think some people aren't prepared to make sacrifices to be a SAHM so are surprised when others do. I don't get much negativity but then alot of the people I mix with are SAHM's

Im soooo glad to be a sahm this time ! with Caitlyn I was back at work parttime when she was 6 months, full time by the time she was a year old, its so nice not to have to worry that I wont be able to go to her school athletics etc , I felt like I missed out on so much .
She was kind enough to do her first steps and words on the days I was home however

I love that with Ty I will be at home with him every day , watching him grow, and I can't wait til he grows, then we can do even more fun activities, like playdough and lego etc , and when C gets home I can be there to greet her (actually , I pick her up , which is another thing I love being able to do )

DH doesn't want me to go back to work until the next one is at school and only part time, and only if I really want to , so im very grateful , cos I love this life .

If you are happy being a SAHM and your daughter loves having you around, then enjoy it and bugger anyone else, tbh, you will have people b*tching about it if you went back to work , you just can't win .
Remember, what other people think of you , is none of your business , ignore them , and be proud of the job you are doing with your daughter

Thanks guys good to know I am not the only one. TBH I would love to tell these people what I really think when they say these things about me being a SAHM but I am just too nice to do that!

I'm a SAHM and I love it!!! Callum is almost one too and lots of the mums in our playgroup are back at work now, or looking for work, there are only two of us (out of about 12) that have made the decision to stay home.

I get the "when are you going back to work" question a fair bit (although less and less now because people know my response!) and I *used* to get the "don't you wish you had a career/don't you think you're wasting your degree/don't you regret not working" ALL the freaking time when we first moved here as I have only worked part time since 2007 when we moved to Singapore. Really irritating because if I DID feel that way then wouldn't I do something about it?!?!?

I would like to go back to uni and get a Grad Dip Ed but first I want to have all my kids (I'd like 4, I'm working on DH lol). I don't see myself doing more than a few part time hours until my kids are kindy age, and maybe not till they're all at school.

So yip, HeidisMum, I totally get where you're coming from with the negative vibe from some people. I try not to go there with that conversation any more really.

Hmm I might have to come back to this thread, I am very distracted at the moment, I need to go out in 30mins and am nowhere near ready to leave the house!

lemongirl wrote: I find in debates like this the best thing to do is get your bingo card.

That's brilliant!!!!

Well I am the opposite in that I am a "working mum" and I get the 'oh thats a shame" and "it must be hard dropping her off" comments

too right it is and if I had a choice I would be a SAHM until she was at least 5 and at school - anyway my point is it doesn't matter what you do people are always going to have their thoughts - in my opinion a sahm is a great job

I agree with Chris too- I have just started back at work part time and the comments I get from people- "who is looking after your daughter?" in a very negative way. I have to work and I also enjoy it. I think no matter which path you choose people will always judge you so I just smile and nod and get on with it.

I'm a SAHM but have worked part time the whole time. In all honesty, I WOULD go crazy being a full time SAHM, hence why I'm going back to work (hopefully full time) in Feb next year (Ava will be just over 5 months old).

I thought I'd love being a SAHM until the kids went to school but TBH its just not me. I think with DH being away all the time and me not getting a break, its taken its toll.

So coming from both perspectives sort of, I would definitely say its from other people's insecurities or the fact that they can't see past 'what is the norm' or what they did in their day. Like when I had to put Ava in DC at 5 weeks (both kids go 2 days a week) - my Grandma said, 'oh thats terrible, surely you can wait to go back to work). Um, no.

People who comment are probably jealous