C Section??

So im sitting at my desk 2 weeks of work to go. I have been booked in for an elective C section 18th september.
I really wonder if the bond between mother and child is stronger after a natrual birth?

I am so worried and sceared about my soon to be C section.I will be under GA and my husband cant be in the room because the previous c/s was so stressfull.

I had to have one with Katelynat 37weeks as she was breach and i had extreamly high blood pressure.
This time it is optional,because i had one before you get to choose.
I am so afraid of giving birth natrualy, i get so wound up thinking about whats involved and loosing control. Thing is i suffered badly after haing Katelyn with thoughts 0f not doing it properly ie natrual birth.
I have never used ohbaby and its not something i would usually do but i have stumbeled across the site and if there is anyone out there who could possibly help me out i would really appreciate youre advice.
I really dont know what to do.


Edited by Jitske

Jitske, 2 years ago I was in a very similar position. I haemorraged mid-labour with my first baby, it was to do with the placenta so it wasn't likely to happen again but there was always the chance. Throughout my pregnancy I decided I wanted to go for VBAC, I think initially it was because I felt I had "missed out" on the experience and thought it would be better for me and bub. But then at 35 weeks, mw thought baby #2 (Briona) turned breech and it looked like I wouldn't have the choice of going for VBAC because of 2x risk factors.

Well, 2-3 scans later and all of them she had been head down. So I don't know if the mw was feeling wrong (even with second opinion) or if baby was just playing games with us! But I knew that if I had two c/s I might not have another chance at VBAC. I decided to go for VBAC in the end, and it did work out, but I stressed about it from 35-38 weeks because I didn't know for sure if it would work out, or if I'd have to have Emergency CS again - my biggest fear was to have the emergency status again. And I had to let go of feeling like c/s was a "failure" because for me, it had actually been a lot of extra work, and it had got me a healthy, breathing baby.

My close friend went through the same decision a couple of months later but she went for elective c/s like you. She said her 2nd c/s was so much easier because she knew what to expect and it didn't have the emergency stress like her first birth had.

Stock up on freezer meals and grocery shopping that won't expire (cans, toilet paper...); find someone to look after your older child for a few days while you recover at hospital; let yourself accept that having a baby by c/s is not a failing at all (if it's the best choice for your baby's delivery then how can we call that a failure!); and I think you'll be able to look forward to the birth. And this time to have 3 weeks to prepare instead of a few minutes.

i havent had a c est but wanted to say that i dont feel part of that mummy group either but cause both times i was induced and never went into labour naturally. giving birth, whichever way you choose, is never easy.

hi there no theres no norm i had a emergy c-sec with james and felt horrable like i didnt deserve to be a mum and felt i didnt bond with james in thoses frist few weeks i talked about my britwith my mum friends anyone who would listen and it relly does help

gandt i was induced aswell and thought whats wrong with my body i,m not a mother but if you relly feel like it we are just as much mums and in the mothering group as any woman that as had a text book brith big hugs hunn

I totally agree with busymum. I guess VBs are a whole lot of pain crammed into a couple of days and a c/s is spread out pain over a couple of weeks but not unbearable.

Good luck.

I have had two VB's and a CS for my third. There are some people that are always going to find fault in what you do, I have been told that due to my short labours 10 and 2 hours I don't know what real labour is!! And you know what I don't care. A CS is a birth story in itself and as for being easier not to offend anyone but hell my VB's were a dam sight easier than my CS (probably helps that they were uncomplicated and quick).

The way I see it you have carried this child for nine months and you are giving that child life, it doesn't matter which way baby comes you already belong to an exclusive club "motherhood"!

You need to do what is right for you, and not worry about anyone else.

As for your question, I never noticed any difference in bonding with my children, I think what helps is you have to believe that you are doing the right thing and accept that decision. Don't doubt yourself. Having a CS makes you no less of a mother I can't stress that enough.



Edited by nuttymama

And dont worry you will have a birthstory. It might just be that hubby needs to fill in the blanks for you. Tell him to take lots and lots of pictures. And if you can ask the pediatrician to take photos if he is allowed of baby coming out for you.

Great tip about the frozen meals as well. If you can get lots of small toys for your 2 year old that you have in a bag next to you. So when you feed baby your 2 year old can have some special toys. Dont need to be new toys. Just some activities to keep busy with.

I know having a C section is major surgury i think the people that have felt the right to judge on my first C section really dont know andf infact none of them have had one either!!!!
Crazy how i have alloud these people even make me feel less than that.
I was in alot of pain after Katelyn. I did struggle bonding with katelyn but i will try get some skin to skin contact asap.

Oh Funnny funny Monday i started having contractions at baby city lol!!! keiled over the counter so embarresing so off to hospital where eventually they stopped. Mid wife put me off work straight away so this week has been so nice:)
Katy still at day\care so been able to chill out and pre pare my self.

thanks guys rweading youre help has been awsomereally appreciate it

Hehe the guys at Mitre10 would have you at the hospital in an ambulance asap on account of freaking out!

smoody wrote: And dont worry you will have a birthstory. It might just be that hubby needs to fill in the blanks for you.

I used my maternity notes to help me remember all of it or the order of things. And that wasn't just after the c/s either!

Oh, and I couldn't imagine a stronger bond to my bubba!