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ElfsMum View Drop Down
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    Posted: 07 February 2008 at 4:00pm
gonna talk to mw today but it appears thats what i have...i thought it was about the hard time I'm having bfing but it seems I'm just hormonal about everything..really its not that bad..i have a wonderful son and wonderful DH who helps me with everything and a great milk supply.. just have sore nipples and no sleep....find it hard to sleep as i worry about him:) but i think its natural...

I just want to know how long has this lasted for others and how can i stop it turning into PND..or am I destined to have it now i have baby blues?
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Bel View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Bel Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 February 2008 at 4:13pm
Hey kaww - I felt the same as you after I had Luke and found the worst thing to do was worry that it might be PND...

I spent the first 2 weeks crying every day and not doing anything except spending time with my boy... eventually I got over it and don't cry very often anymore (yesterday being the exception). I put most of mine down to a severe lack of sleep and once I started catching up as Luke started sleeping longer, I started feeling heaps better. It was about 4 weeks before I felt like ME again though.

So don't worry, just relax and enjoy your boy! You went through a big traumatic event only 6 days ago, so cut yourself some slack and relax!!
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.Mel View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote .Mel Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 February 2008 at 4:24pm
I had a real rough time for probably about 3 weeks. I remember coming on here when Cooper was 5 days old, and I was so tired and so emotional that I just let it all out, and the support that I got from the girls was incredible. So you are probably at the same stage I was so hang in there I reckon after the weekend you'll start slowly coming right.

My nipples cracked open and the only thing that gave me relief was Nipple Cream. Have you got some?

Bel is right it does get better, I think you will find you will wake up one day and have a epiphany and suddenly everything will come right. Give yourself some time, and give yourself a break too.
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cuppatea View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote cuppatea Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 February 2008 at 4:43pm
I'm sure it is just normal baby blues and nothing more. Let me know what the m/w says. I was a complete wreck for the first few weeks (well actually I was ok the first week and then a wreck for a few weeks).
I'm at work tomorrow but if you like I can come down at the weekend and give you a hand for a couple of hours.

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I would think it is just the baby blues (don't they suck big time). hang in there it does get better. If it does develop into PND don't worry to much there are places to help you.

I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived!
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ElfsMum View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ElfsMum Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 February 2008 at 6:07pm
thanks everyone:) mel..yes the nipple cream great..i worried he would get some of my blood..and that would be bad..lol..after having the day talking to DH and sleeping i feel sooooo much better..so hopefully its just as you said bel..

feeding him is just awesome besides the nipple thing..and i think even if i end up giving him formula that won't change:) I'm hoping it's just hormonal ups and downs.. pity i cant predict when they come..thanks cuppatea..might just do that.. he sleeps 5 hours at a time during the day though..:) i guess its just hormonal that i feel i cant cope sometimes. when its 3am and I'm knackered and he's crying but it always works out..just a little stressed bout Dh going back to work as well!
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cuppatea View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote cuppatea Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 February 2008 at 6:15pm
Does he have jaundice? did the midwife say it is ok to let him sleep for that long during the day? I was told not to let Spencer go more than 3 hours (as if, he only goes 3 hours between feeds now) but he had jaundice so it may have been because of that cos that can make them more sleepy and is important to feed often cos the milk helps clear it up.

Glad you are feeling better.

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.Mel View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote .Mel Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 February 2008 at 6:39pm
Yeah I personally wouldn't let him go 5 hrs, at his age he should be around 2 1/2 - 3hrs, but every baby is different.
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ElfsMum View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ElfsMum Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 February 2008 at 6:48pm
noone has said anything about waking him up but i will check.. its more like 4 and a half.. he did have a bit of jaundice but he doesn't anymore.. like today he went 615am till 1045 then 1240- 450 then 610 - ...

so why do i need to wake him? to feed him more ?or because he wont sleep at night ?
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cuppatea View Drop Down
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Personally I wouldn't let him go over 3 hours as he may not be getting enough food in the day and waking up at night, he also might be mistaking night for day and having his big sleeps during the day instead of at night. Do you make the day time different to night? What I did was feed and bum change during the day, bum change would be fun, with me talking/singing etc then if time a little bit of play (just on playmat for 5 mins or cuddles with DH etc. At night I would feed him in the dark (I would sit in lounge but only have hall light on), would also change his nappy in the dark too and then put him straight to bed, would keep interaction to the bare minimum. Also another trick I found handy was to put him back on the boob after changing nappy cos it would make him sleepy again.

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ElfsMum View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ElfsMum Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 February 2008 at 7:02pm
yes we do try to make difference during the day but as you say probably do interact a little too much at night with him.. i will talk to mw about it and then sort it out...as you say I'd rather 3/4 hours at night than during the day!:) at the mo..curtains open and more noise in daytime and up a bit in between feeds then fed and straight back to bed at night (well i try!)
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cuppatea View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote cuppatea Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 February 2008 at 7:05pm
Yeah is not always easy, just wait until he starts smiling and wanting to play at night

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ShellandBella View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ShellandBella Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 February 2008 at 7:06pm
If he sleeps lots during the day, you may find he'll get his days/nights mixed up. I always did 3 hourly max during the day...

I think baby blues are pretty normal, its a total shock having a baby, and then the lack of sleep and the sore boobs . I felt pretty rotten yesterday cos Bella was so sick but I'm sure it was the tiredness that had me feeling that way. Nothing like a walk in the fresh air to clarify things


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mum2paris View Drop Down
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with the waking thing as others have said, it's good to wake about 3hourly in the day which means you can leave longer at night like 4 and a half hours-ish, means hopefully you'll get the days and nights sorted. It's also important to make sure they are fed at least 4 hourly anyway just to make sure they're getting the right amount of feeds during the day otherwise they'll either make up for it with a rotten night of waking constantly, or they'll just not really get enough food which means next time you'll have a sleepy baby with not enough energy to have a great feed, or long term can mean poor weight gains, just the same as us really.. if you think about it can you go 5 hours without eating or drinking? not many adults do, and we are finished growing, babies are growing so quick and need that fuel, their tummies hold so little so they need to be fed often to make up for that..

With the cracked nipples thing, see if you can get your midwife to help you latch him, or watch you feed to make sure he's on just right, because from what i have seen and worked with, even with cracked nipples, if he is on far enough they shouldn't hurt throughout the whole feed,they might be sore at first but if he's on far enough they will rest against the soft palate at the back and won't be pinched up against the hard palate roof of his mouth with each suck (which causes the OUCH!) also, as our lactation consultant in our unit says, it won't hurt baby if your nipple does bleed a little bit, you just need to be aware of this as quite often we get mums in who say their baby is sicking up blood with their milky spills when actually its tiny streaks of stuff they have swallowed and perfectly harmless.

In all, baby blues sucks, and yep like most new things it really does take a few weeks to really get into the swing of things, sleep deprivation is the cruelest form of torture, and the fastest way to become unhinged. All parents of bubs worry, the main thing is to recognise if it's normal worry or if it's the kind of sitting-by-his-cot while he sleeps too scared to sleep yourself kind of worry.. because that's a bit more than baby blues.   motherhood is one of the hardest jobs, and like starting any new job it takes time to feel like everything fits well and feels right, for the first few weeks to months you kinda just fudge your way through - the main thing to remember is get help and ask questions.(he he, like you've done)

Edited by mum2paris
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Maya View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Maya Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 February 2008 at 8:04pm
I remember one of the Due in Oct '06 mums posting when our babies were all small something along the lines of "coming out of the haze" after the first six weeks, and it really rang true for me. The first six weeks are the "getting to know each other" phase, and they really are like a blur, sleeplessness, aches and pains post-birth, feeding problems, and of course all the wild hormones that fluctuate after birth, it's amazing any of us survive.
But we do. And some of us go on to get PND, some of us don't. I had the baby blues something chronic both times, but only got PND after the gremlins. Either way, there are ways to cope and manage and get through, and lots of people here to support you.
Hugs.
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ElfsMum View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ElfsMum Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 08 February 2008 at 12:33pm
as ive said in another thread wont be online for a while..but wanted to say thanks..mw still hasnt got here :( but i will ask her about all this.. he has woken up by himself every three hours so far today..and slept 3 hours at night with a two hour awake period at 415-615 lol.. but I'm sure it'll get sorted..i feel better knowing it's all normal..and its not stand by his cot scared..its more will i wake up when he cries...as DH can sleep through everything!:) and will i cope when Dh goes back to work kinda worry.. I'm sure we will get there.. he's doing all the 'right things' apparently...wet nappies etc that sorta stuff.. and the nipples only hurt in the beginning...so that's good i guess?anyway i gotta go .. thanks again.
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mum2paris View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote mum2paris Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 08 February 2008 at 12:55pm
kewl, good luck and i hope the haze clears soon.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote nikkitheknitter Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 08 February 2008 at 1:43pm
I just wanted to add that day 7 was the day I had a mega breakdown - just another part of the delightful baby blues. Seemed to get a lot better after that and didn't develop into PND
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ElfsMum View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ElfsMum Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 10 February 2008 at 7:49am
just wanted to say ti has got a lot clearer....thankyou.. we are both doing well..and im glad for me it was only a few days of horribleness:(
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Bizzy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 10 February 2008 at 9:03am
i remember mine hit about day 4 really badly with gabriel.

My mw turned up and i answered the door in bra and knickers holding a screaming baby with tears running down my face and practically threw the baby at her. Next time she turned up with pamphlets about PND and very worried...but i had a handle on it by then.

those damn hormones can really play havoc and i suppose it could make it hard to distinguish between that and PND.

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