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surfergirl View Drop Down
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    Posted: 21 October 2008 at 9:48pm

I just feel like having a vent, so please allow me a little self indulgance...

Last weekend (when we were in Wanaka/Q'town for work) I had a bleed which resulted in a scan on Monday showing I had lost our baby. This was gutting, but after 2.5 days of not knowing I was glad to finally know one way or another. (Disclaimer - personal belief to follow) I believe that this happened for a reason and I am (sort of) OK with the whole thing. I am gutted, but resolute that these things happen, and that we know we can concieve and that for many this is not even possible.

I wanted to have a D & C ASAP so that we could move on and get back to trying. After speaking with my midwife I was under the impression that this morning I could get in at Chch Womans' and get it done. This morning I turned up, for what I thought would be the worst day of my life only to be told that this wasn't possible and that I was not going to get a D&C, until at least Thursday.

This might not seem so bad, but DH and I were planning on leaving to go on a week long holiday tomorrow morning. (Yes, I was planning on leaving the day after a D&C) I know it sounds odd, but this holiday and some quiet time with DH was really what I needed and was something I was holding on to....

Anyhow, I said to the Dr, fine I'll have the D&C when I get back from holiday'...this would have sucked too as the first day I'm back would have been my 31st b'day...but I didn't want to cancel the holiday as I have paid for accommodation and tickets to Phantom of the Opera (sad, I know!).

But...she basically said NO WAY...lots of drama about worse case senario etc (bleeding out on the ferry etc)...so we have had to go with a D & C on Thursday...

So, other than losing the baby, having a later than anticpated D & C and all the other blah-ness that goes with losing a baby we have also had to cancel our holiday (which I really needed after running the business for three months while the boss has been away....)

Arrrhhggggghhhhh.....basically woe is me.....sorry for the winge!

And after a few glasses of wine...sorry if this makes no sense!

Edited to add - I was 11 weeks at the scan on Monday, so gutted I had come so far...and I'm over 'feeling' preg...I just want to feel normal again...for a month at least...



Edited by surfergirl
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mummy_becks View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote mummy_becks Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 21 October 2008 at 9:51pm

No way vent away. I would be really angry if I had to cancel my trip to see the Phantom as well.

That really sucks you have to wait as well.

I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived!
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BaAsKa View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote BaAsKa Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 21 October 2008 at 9:53pm
oh surfergirl im really sorry!!!
What a horrible thing to be going through!!!

sorry no advice just big hugs!!!!!
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caitlynsmygirl View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote caitlynsmygirl Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 21 October 2008 at 10:33pm
oh hun , you act as if you are upset about nothing, or dont have a right to be upset , of course you do , you've had a really horrible few weeks , im so sorry for your loss, and im so sorry you didnt get the birthday and holiday you deserved



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my4beauties View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote my4beauties Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 21 October 2008 at 10:33pm
BIG BIG hugs surfergirl!  I didn't realise you'd just miscarried.  I'm soo sorry to hear this!  And to miss out on your holiday now too..... that must be so frustrating for you.  Love and hugs coming your way! xx oo xx
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Maya View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Maya Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 21 October 2008 at 10:44pm
Hugs! I can't believe how crap the system is here with m/c, a friend went thru a similar experience. I was lucky (if you can call it that ) that I miscarried our last baby in Sydney and had a d and c the same day they confirmed our baby had died.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote WestiesGirl Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 21 October 2008 at 11:09pm
Aww Hun Im so sorry to hear your loss

We were exactly the same. Had accommodation booked for a weekend away on the Sunshine coast only to need a D&C the Friday we were meant to leave. We went through emergency so I was seen that day but didnt have the D&C done until 6pm that night and was admited over night. We ended up canceling our wee holiday which sucked as we desperately needed a break.

Vent away hun. We're here to listen and vent with you Am thinking of you during this sad time.
Our Angel July 08 Gone but not forgotten

And to complete our family, our princess has arrived
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Snappy View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Snappy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 October 2008 at 7:51am
Im so sorry for your loss. What a crappy system. I hope things get better for you, sounds like you are in need of some hugs!
Mummy to two beauties... Formerly Kaiz.
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surfergirl View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote surfergirl Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 October 2008 at 8:29am

Thanks everyone for your support and understanding (and the hugs!). For some reason I am finding it hard to talk to people in real life...but I knew you'd understand!

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MrsMojo View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrsMojo Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 October 2008 at 8:33am
Oh man, that really sux.  I'm sorry that you've lost your little one and that you now can't have the holiday you've been looking forward to.  I hope things start looking up for you soon.
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caraMel View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote caraMel Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 October 2008 at 8:43am
I'm sorry for your loss Surfergirl and how sucky that you have to miss out on your holiday too!
Life can be so hard sometimes.
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IVFGirl1111 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote IVFGirl1111 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 October 2008 at 9:14am
Just seen this E, so sorry to hear your having such a hard time, guttered about the holiday I know you were looking forward to it

Thinking of you and here if you need me xx
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aussiegirl View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote aussiegirl Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 October 2008 at 9:16am
Thinking of you So sorry to hear your news
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DzinerGirl View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote DzinerGirl Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 October 2008 at 9:42am
So sorry about your loss surfergirl
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emz View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote emz Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 October 2008 at 2:36pm
Oh E! I didn't know hun, I'm so sorry for your loss and so sorry you're being mucked around!

And yes, vent away, you have every right to be sad, angry.. whatever you want and need to feel!
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lovingmummyhood View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote lovingmummyhood Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 October 2008 at 8:18pm
I'm so sorry for your loss.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote nikkitheknitter Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 October 2008 at 9:16am
Hey E... I'm sorry I'm late to read this thread but xoxoxoxoxoxox
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fallen View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote fallen Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 October 2008 at 10:11am
So sorry for your loss. What a crappy way to treat someone. I hope things start looking up for you soon,
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote NeoshasMummy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 October 2008 at 4:14pm
Oh hun im so so sorry for your loss and all this mucking around. I do hope you start to feel better about things soon.


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