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poppy101 View Drop Down
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    Posted: 05 November 2014 at 10:04pm
Hi there,
Im just curious if anyone has looked into fostering long term through CYFS to offer a baby/child a secure home? Im due to start ivf in feb, but am constantly worrying about what if it doesn't work?? I had a wee look into 'home for life' through cyfs and am considering applying to foster. Has anyone looked into this option?
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Mrs Impatient View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Mrs Impatient Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 06 November 2014 at 2:37pm
Hi Poppy
I know I always had that in the back of my mind but never actually enquired about it and luckily my IVF round worked. I have a lady from my ante-natal group that has been looking after an 8 year old girl for the past 12 mths every second weekend and each school holidays. They applied to CYFS at the beginning of this year to 'adopt' (they have done the home for life option) and found out this week that they have been accepted and are having her full time from next month YAY

TTC Mar 2011
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Lesley104550 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Lesley104550 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 06 November 2014 at 3:46pm
Hi Poppy,

my partner and I are going to look at the fostering option but have to put it off till next year for various reasons. I have also looked at the cyfs website at the "home for life" option but there are a couple of other places you can foster through as well.

I will keep my fingers crossed for your ivf in Feb. We had 2 failed ivf rounds which is why we want to foster now.

Good luck!
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poppy101 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote poppy101 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 06 November 2014 at 6:05pm
Hi mrs impatient and Lesley,
thanks for ur reply. Wow that is awesome about ur friend giving the little girl a stable home permanently, i think it would be very rewarding! I might wait and see how next year goes for me with ivf before looking into it seriously. Mrs impatient, did ur friend get the opportunity to say whether she wanted a baby, child or teen or is it really just whoever is needing a home? Lesley, what are the other places u can foster through? Id like to look into them further.
Lesley, sorry to hear of ur failed cycles, will look into ivf againin the future?
A friend of a friend registered to foster through cyfs and last week shes got a phone call to say they need a home for a 7mth old baby girl which made me want to foster. The baby will be placed with them next week permanently. ,
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Lesley104550 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Lesley104550 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 06 November 2014 at 6:24pm
Poppy, I google "become a foster parent" or something like that. Theres the open home foundation (ohf.org.nz) theres also barnados and salvation army. I am sure you will find plenty of info.
I think I will just call cyfs to get started cos I think they are the only ones that offer home for life.
great story about your friend
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Kazper View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Kazper Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 06 November 2014 at 6:25pm
Hi Poppy, my DH and I are in the waiting pool for adoption and may look in to home for life in the near future.  There are similarities.  In answer to your question about babies, yes I think you can state your preference.  At the end of the day they always ask you before putting a child in to your care and lots of babies are put in to home for life, some from as early as new born.





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babycrazy View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote babycrazy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 06 November 2014 at 6:37pm
Hey all,

Have thought about this option too. Kazper - what process did you go through to get into the adoption pool. I'd love to hear from someone who's been through it first hand.
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Kazper View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Kazper Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 06 November 2014 at 7:01pm
We made contact with an Adoption Agent and they in turn set up our first day course.  Adoption Agent's work with CYFS and in their offices so if you call your nearest CYFS office they will be able to get in you in contact with the Adoption Agent in your region. Smile  For Adoption you undertake two one day courses, and three for fostering or home for life.  You then have an interview and medical and police check and then you put together a portfolio.  It sounds like a lot, but really isn't.  I use to think it sounded horrible and and have all the reasons as to why it would be too hard, but then once we were actually ready to do it, it was easy Smile we are glad to be on the other side and in the waiting pool.  We have only been in it since late January and have been out once for consideration.  I feel positive it will happen one day Smile





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babycrazy View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote babycrazy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 06 November 2014 at 7:15pm
Thanks heaps. Do they do home visits or anything?

I was expecting it to be more than that. Do many babies get put up for adoption each year?
TTC since Oct 2009
4 x DI's failed
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poppy101 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote poppy101 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 06 November 2014 at 7:15pm
Thanks Lesley,
i just googled away and it came up with heaps of options. wow, i think it would be amazing to get that phone call with a baby in urgent need of a home, and being able to give that would be so rewarding!
Kazper and babycrazy, thanks for ur replies
:) Kazper, how long did the process take from ringing cyfs to having your portfolio completed for birth parents to see? Do u get much info about how many babies are currently up for adoption? Thanks for sharing information
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Kazper View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Kazper Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 06 November 2014 at 7:26pm
Babycrazy, the interview after the courses were at our home.  It was pretty relaxed and informal Smile

Poppy the process varies.  We live in a small town and our Adoption Agent had to travel from another area and it was right at the middle of winter where roads were closed here almost every weekend we had tried organising a course.  So for us it was probably 9 or 10 months all up, but the process would have been a lot faster and we were quite relaxed with organising the interview and took our time with the portfolio.  We decided to put that part off until after Christmas and New Year so that we would have more fun and recent pics to use.

We don't get information like how many are currently up for adoption.  The reality is that the numbers have dropped significantly in the last couple of years, but our Agent has said its one of those things where some years there is a lot and others not so much.  Just one of those things like this whole TTC journey where there are no answers.  You kind of sit in limbo waiting and hoping.  However at least with this we have done everything we can and really just have to sit back and stay hopeful and get on with life without trying to think about it too much Smile

I have heard that there are a lot of babies and children that go up for home for life though and that would happen much faster than adoption so it might be something you might like to look at Smile





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Mushroom View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Mushroom Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 06 November 2014 at 7:26pm
From what I've read on adoption in Auckland I believe there are around 9 kids adopted out each year. Foster-for-life is a much more definite way of adopting a child, though these kids often come from absolutely heart-breaking backgrounds. I know someone who fosters, and have met a number of the kids through her doors. She was offered to adopt the ones she had been looking after, but didn't as she's older now and it was a group of 3 including a 6 mth old.

From what I understand, family groups are more common, as parents often have their kids put into the foster system several times before they are permanently removed.
Me: 35, PCOS, endo, DH: 34, severe MFI
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poppy101 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote poppy101 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 06 November 2014 at 7:41pm
Thanks mushroom and Kazper,
this is definitely something i want to look into, especially the home for life option. icant imagine some of the stories and background of these kiddies would be very sad!
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Charlie6 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Charlie6 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 06 November 2014 at 8:12pm
We have also started looking into this, and is something we would like to do eventually even if we are lucky enough to have a baby of our own... I spoke to cyfs a couple of months ago, and the lady said that in the past year 11 children had been adopted in NZ, not as common as it once was, and quite rare to get a newborn/baby as generally someone within the wider family will take care of them... It's funny (not in the haha sense) as people who have no clue about going through IVF and all the heartbreak infertility brings often say "oh well you can just adopt' like its so easy to go and choose a child for your family...
Would love to hear how the process goes for you... good luck xx
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poppy101 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote poppy101 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 06 November 2014 at 9:18pm
Hi charlie,
it is definitely something we will look at doing even if ivf works for us and we have a child of our own. Totally get what ur saying about, oh well just adopt... if only it was that easy huh! Im thinking I might give cyfs a call within the next few weeks to find out a bit more
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote rosiefarmer Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 17 February 2015 at 7:16pm
Hey ladies,
I havent been in the forum for ages, I have 2 home for life children, one we got when he was 3 months old, and the other he was 10 months old. They are now 3 and almost 2, best thing we ever did after 2 failed rounds of IVF.
IVF - ICIS 1 - June 2010 BFN
TER - Oct 2010 BFN
IVF - ICIS 2 - April 2011
BFP
31st May no heartbeat D & C ,
[url=http://lilypie.com][
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Lesley104550 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Lesley104550 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 February 2015 at 6:41pm
Thx Rosie,
can you tell me about the process? We had 2 failed ivfs last year and are now seriously considering the home for life option.
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rosiefarmer View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote rosiefarmer Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 February 2015 at 7:25pm
We did the two day course run by cyfs did police checks health check had 2 interviews at home. Did two profiles one for each pool adoption an HFL. Profiles got accepted 11 days later we got phone call to say they had a baby boy for HFL we rushed into town for a meeting it was Friday we picked baby up from airport on Sunday. The next baby we were in pool again for 6 months birthmother chose us second time an we have a good relationship.
IVF - ICIS 1 - June 2010 BFN
TER - Oct 2010 BFN
IVF - ICIS 2 - April 2011
BFP
31st May no heartbeat D & C ,
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Lesley104550 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Lesley104550 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 February 2015 at 8:41pm
Wow! Do you remember how long it took?
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Bec174326 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 February 2015 at 7:13pm
I'm pleased to have found this thread as we have our first meeting with a social worker next week. We're looking at providing weekend/holiday respite care. We've been TTC for a year and I'd just love to have kids in our life some way. This is something we'd be keen to continue even if we are lucky with fertility treatment.
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