2nd c-section? Who makes the decision?

Hey Chuffed!

Thanks for coming in and sharing your story. What you have been through sounds so tough. I am totally sick of midwives running there own agenda when it comes to VBAC's and anything for that matter.

This was a concern of mine when I went to the OB, and he said it's pretty hard to find a midwife that doesn't want to run there own show, instead of finding out what you really want and why. I know so many people that have had a difficult time and in most of the cases it's because they weren't being heard. I think a lot of these midwives have a lot to answer for, it's not about what they want. They have left a lot of broken people that are trying to put themselves back together after there experience and they are long gone.
That was just a vent...

I'm so sorry chuffed that your side effects have resulted in something so serious for you, fertility treatment is a whole different rollercoaster. I wish you all the luck in the world.
Take care
Hayley

I have been very lucky as I had a fantastic midwife (and back up MW - they were both there for the whole ordeal) who supported me through out, especially when things stared to go wrong, she always made sure my birthing partners (DH & my Mum) & I knew exactly what was happening and why (doesn't stop it from being scary tho! ).
For me, it was a couple of months after the birth and after I had been discharged from the MW that I started to question everything that happend, what could I have done differently?!?!? yadda yadda. Unfortunately my Plunket Nurse was CRAP!

I've spoken to Kirsten (my MW) recently as we were thinking of having another baby early next year (that's on hold now) and she was fantastic again! Talked me through the pros and cons of both (elective CS & VBAC) and put things into perspective for us as we'll have Caitlin to look after too as well as a newborn and needing time for me to recover.

She did say that the chance of another baby being in the same position and with all the other things that happend that basically stopped her coming out the "normal" way is about a million to 1, but she also said that it wasn't a very nice experience for a first timer and putting herself in my shoes she would have an elective next time too. And that's coming from a midwife that is very pro home birthing! (not that she ever rammed that option on me at all!)

I do believe that your birthing experience has a lot to do with your relationship with the midwife. Kirsten managed to turn what was a terrifying situation around to a positive one "at least you have a perfectly healthy baby and you are ok etc".
I was lucky and we hit it off from the moment we met but I've heard of a lot of people that interview heaps of MWs until they find one they are comfortable with. Afterall, this is the person you are trusting with your life and that of your baby!

Not sure if you are in Auckland Hays, but I highly recommend my old Midwife Kirsten Augier (not sure what practice she works out of now though) and my back-up Helen Casey has moved back down to Timaru. Both were amazing and I would be happy to have either again for our second child

As for OBs, I'm seeing Anil Sharma for possible endo problems and he's awesome too! He also does the OB specialist questions on here and came highly recommended by a few of the girls on here too that had used him as an OB and a Gnae

ok - huuuuge waffle over now

Look after yourself and same, if you ever need to chat PM or email me

Toni