Author |
Topic Search Topic Options
|
Candkids
Senior Member
Joined: 03 April 2007
Location: BOP
Points: 2503
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Topic: changing schools Posted: 31 October 2008 at 9:14pm |
bit of a rant but really need everyones advice!
ok so im in 2 minds about this
basicly i sent sarah to my old primary school as i really loved it there
but she also got accepted to a smaller catholic school
anyway she has been bullied on and off all year and it has really given her confidence a knock and she has become quite reserved, when shes at school she wont say boo anymore where as shes always been 1 of those kids who would talk to anyone / anywhere and she doesnt stop talking(drives me up the wall)
anyway the school didnt do anything about the bullying
she has had a rough time making friends with a few leaving etc or she will make friends with someone but then one of their kindy friends will start so she kinda gets ditched
and generally plays by herself most of the time
so . .
i thought id take her to look at the smaller school . . which she absolutly loved when we took her around and she talked non stop to the principal even asked if she could start tomorrow! she raved about it to dh and her nanna how great it was and all the stuff they had and a pool
but then . . .
as soon as we got home, she screamed blue murder that she didnt want to go there and didnt want to make new friends (she already knows at least 4 people at the school) doesnt know anyone there and that her teacher had told her she didnt want her to leave as she would miss her and be sad
so
opinions please!!!!!! please please tell me what youd do if you were in my situation, dh is being no help at all
|
 DD 10.5yrs DS 6yrs DS 11mths 5 little angles watching from above
|
 |
Sponsored Links
|
|
 |
Jennz
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: Wellington
Points: 1897
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 31 October 2008 at 10:25pm |
Hmmmm tough one!
DHs sister just pulled her daughter out for similar reasons. Is the bullying still going on? If it is I would write a formal letter of complaint to the principal and if that doesn't work then to the school board- thats absolutely disgusting that they haven't done anything about it. Do you know what the schools policy on bullying is?
Personally I think you should exhaust all the possibilities at her current school first before moving her.
In saying that, I went to one school where I was bullied and I hated it but I didn't really know any different, so I just thought that was what school was like. I went there for 18 months then we moved across town and I changed to another school- I absolutely LOVED it there, it was one of the best things my Mum ever did.
Sorry, thats probably just confused you more
Good luck in your decision!
|
Jen, Charlotte 7 & Kate 3
|
 |
caitlynsmygirl
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Points: 8777
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 31 October 2008 at 10:33pm |
poor little mite, shes scared ,her confidence has probably gotten that low , that she feels if she leaves the school shes at now, it will be even worse for her ...the whole "better the devil you know " thing ...
Personally , I would go with my gut instinct , if you feel its better for her to take her out , then do , and make sure you give her patience and space to settle in to the new school.
I think that there will still be some issues to address , self confidence , self worth etc, because changing schools wont necessarily solve all the problems.
I think tho, that you have to do what is right for your daughter, and while you should take into consideration how shes feeling , also take into consideration that a lot of her fears are due to her confidence being so shattered .
Poor little thing, makes my heart break for her
|
|
 |
caitlynsmygirl
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Points: 8777
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 31 October 2008 at 10:36pm |
sorry , if I didnt make myself very clear in my post , I believe that while running away doesnt solve anything, in situations like this, there are times when change can be a very positive thing ,so to put it bluntly , I would probably change her school.
Perhaps instead of starting straight away tho ,you could ease her into it , would another couple of months at her present school be ok , or have things gotten that bad...and if things have gotten "that bad" then i guess you already know the answer dont you ?
|
|
 |
peanut butter
Senior Member
Joined: 20 February 2007
Points: 8044
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 01 November 2008 at 8:54am |
I think I'd be leaning towards changing her too. It doesnt sound like her current school acknowledges the problem or has the balls to do something about it. Much as I dont care for religion, I have heard that catholic schools are often really good and kids tend to thrive in them (there are of course exceptions to that but most people I know swear by them)
|
 |
Bizzy
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: New Zealand
Points: 10974
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 01 November 2008 at 10:19am |
nzpiper wrote:
I think I'd be leaning towards changing her too. It doesnt sound like her current school acknowledges the problem or has the balls to do something about it. |
yeah, me too if that was the case. however if her current school is actively doing something about the bullying i would perhaps stay with that one.
|
|
 |
Candkids
Senior Member
Joined: 03 April 2007
Location: BOP
Points: 2503
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 01 November 2008 at 11:59am |
thanks guys,
her current school had soooo many complaints about bullying in her year, and i mentioned it to the principal in april and she didnt seem to want to know. and the board just really seem to like the sound of their own voices IYGWIM.
funny tho as i had a call from the principal yesterday as sarah had mentioned that she wasnt happy to her and aparently sarahs teacher "didnt know anything about it" ! which really Pi$$3d me off as i have discussed it with her numerous times.
|
 DD 10.5yrs DS 6yrs DS 11mths 5 little angles watching from above
|
 |
Bizzy
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: New Zealand
Points: 10974
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 01 November 2008 at 5:41pm |
i would move her then. obviously the kids arent their number one priority!
|
|
 |
mylilmosaic
Senior Member
Joined: 14 June 2007
Location: New Zealand
Points: 1348
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 01 November 2008 at 6:19pm |
Catzkids I really feel for you, it is a difficult one. I was in a similar situation when my son was in year 5 he was being bullied by one particular boy in his class. Evenutually after watching my sons confidence change and him saying things like he really hates so and so (strong words for him), I organised a meeting with the school principal. I told them I would move J out of this class (it was a Te Reo yr 4,5, & 6 class, which he loved) if something wasn't done!
It worked out good for my son as they promptly moved this other child out of my sons class, as it turned out my boy wasn't they only one being bullied by him.
I guess I would do as Jennz suggests and really try and get the school to act on this first, and I would only move her after you felt they really weren't addressing the bullying problems.
My son J, also went to a catholic school when he first start at 5 yrs and it was a great school  , athough not the same school where the bullying occurred.
Sorry for the novel
|
 |