Choosing sex?
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URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383
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Topic: Choosing sex?
Posted By: Snickerdoodle
Subject: Choosing sex?
Date Posted: 19 June 2008 at 12:42pm
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OK, this is a little bit of an inflammatory subject, I'm sure..
But I'm interested in people's opinions. http://blogs.nzherald.co.nz/blog/your-views/2008/6/19/should-parents-have-right-choose-sex-their-unborn-babies/?c_id=1501154 - This is today's front page story... I'm pro natural selection. I don't feel people should be able to choose. UNLESS it's for medical reasons. ie: Breast cancer runs in your family, so you'd want a boy. But then, what's to say he won't get prostate cancer later in life.. It's such a hard one 
I absolutely draw the line at designer babies though. Opinions?  ------------- 
http://lilypie.com">  
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Replies:
Posted By: Mikaela
Date Posted: 19 June 2008 at 12:48pm
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I have no problem with people who go through IVF choosing the sex. I fail to see how it hurts anyone else.
Also, the story in the Herald was calling it 'Who Gets Born' which I think is too emotive. It implies abortion based on gender (which obviously I'm extremely opposed to, I think most people would be), rather than just choosing one blastocyst over another before transferring it to the uterus. A blastocyst isn't a 'real' baby because otherwise unused embryos couldn't be disposed of after IVF treatment had finished. So the way they're talking about it at the moment is a bit of a double standard. Someone - Mellybelly? Ginger? - who has done IVF will know way more about this than me, I'm just going on my fairly limited understanding. ------------- http://www.bump-and-beyond.com"> 
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Posted By: Snickerdoodle
Date Posted: 19 June 2008 at 12:52pm
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Yeah, I would be interested from an IVF recipient's point of view.
I agree with your comment about not hurting anyone else. But I just feel there could be adverse repercussions from it. What if 90% or people choose girls, for example. There would be a complete imbalance in gender population. eta: I just don't like the though that, for any of those selections, you have to make a bunch of embryos to choose from, so you know right from the word go that you are making life only to dispose of it if it doesn't fit what you want, and being the wrong gender is a really frivolous reason to do that, I think. -------------
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: ginger
Date Posted: 19 June 2008 at 1:00pm
To be honest, I can absolutely say that for myself, I have been through so much, and fought so hard to have a child, that even if they'd given me the option I wouldn't have taken it. I want a child so much, and gender means nothing. Whether our child is a boy or a girl, it'll be it's own special person. I can't imagine choosing not to have the child I'll have ... does that make sense? I think you'll find that the majority of people who must go through IVF would choose not to be there, and just want a child, boy or girl. For us, life and health are all that matter. I'm not for it. ------------- Cuinn Lachlan 23.1.09 - 22:00 Antonia Helene 4.8.11 - 09:41 |
MamaPickle wrote:Posted By: AliaDawn
Date Posted: 19 June 2008 at 1:02pm
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There would be huge problems in countries that favor one gender - china for example is already having problems with more boys than girls, and that's only from the people who are willing to go through less than legal means to do so, or at the least less than moral.
I'm with ginger, except I didn't have to go through IVF of course, but I'll be perfectly happy with whatever gender I get. -------------  
 
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Posted By: ginger
Date Posted: 19 June 2008 at 1:04pm
And yes, that's a really good point. It's difficult knowing that you have embryos who will possibly be destroyed - it's still life in my opinion (eg. I have 5 embryos, and if our next FET works first time, we will be in a position where 4 will be destroyed). We're in the position where we may have to make that decision because we have no other choice - I can't imagine choosing to be in that position for something so, as you say, frivilous!, as to choosing a boy or girl. And what if all your embryos were one sex, the opposite to what you wanted???? ------------- Cuinn Lachlan 23.1.09 - 22:00 Antonia Helene 4.8.11 - 09:41 |
Posted By: Roksana
Date Posted: 19 June 2008 at 1:22pm
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I think its wrong. Well thats JMO
I really want a boy this time but if it is a girl I would love her to death. For me...its my child, my flesh and blood...doesnt matter what gender. But again JMO. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: LJsmum
Date Posted: 19 June 2008 at 1:27pm
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It's WRONG.... How can we decide what gender should be born. It's just too scary to mess with creation.
Just my opinion but nope can't believe it would/ could happen! -------------  
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Posted By: MrsMojo
Date Posted: 19 June 2008 at 1:49pm
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I don't like the idea of designer babies at all. I think it's wrong.
I agree with this
Maybe you could just insert them all in one go and try to have quintuplets next time around -------------  
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I'd hate to be in that position. I could just imagine myself taking out an extra mortgage to pay for IVF 5 more times to give all my ice babies a chance. 
Posted By: FionaS
Date Posted: 19 June 2008 at 3:28pm
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I totally disagree with it, in part, because I definately view it as a slippery slope towards other types of engineering. Playing God has too many far reaching consequences. Gender is not an illness so why treat it as such? We run the risk of all kinds of unplanned ramifications as a society as a whole. ------------- Mummy to Gabrielle and Ashley |
Posted By: Snickerdoodle
Date Posted: 19 June 2008 at 5:14pm
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Well said Fiona
Exactly what I was going for, I'm just not as eloquent  -------------
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: yummymummy
Date Posted: 19 June 2008 at 7:29pm
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I'm actaully all for it - if you're paying for IVF, why not have the option to choose the sex? I don't think it will create an imbalance in society as not many couples undergo IVF and most of those (like Ginger) probably wouldn't care to take up the option. However, if say a couple with 5 boys want a girl and are willing to go thru IVF, I don't see why it shouldn't be an option.
Ok I'm dunking now ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Paws
Date Posted: 19 June 2008 at 8:03pm
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I personally don't agree with it, while I see IVF as an amazing blessing that can give people like ginger the child they have dreamed of, I feel the same as Fiona, it's playing God far too much for my liking.
------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 19 June 2008 at 8:23pm
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I'm not comfy with the playing God aspect either. I can see the merits in cases where there are certain gender-specific genetic conditions, but then where do you draw the line between what conditions qualify? Does a family history of breast cancer justify only selecting a male embryo "just in case" or is it only OK in the case of major, life-affecting, definite genetic conditions like haemophilia. And since it's possible to test an for those genetic conditions without testing the gender...
I'm with whoever said it's a slippery slope... -------------  Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 19 June 2008 at 8:26pm
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PS. Even as I am about to give birth to my fourth wee girl, I can't honestly say I'd be keen on gender selection should I have any more babies. ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: Bobbie
Date Posted: 19 June 2008 at 8:34pm
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I totally agree with Fiona's comment. It is a slippery slope.
May be an extreme but I keep thinking of the movie Gattaca. The problem is that the UK and the US already allow it (so they said in the news) so I think it's just a matter of time before it becomes commonplace. -------------  
 
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Posted By: Jennz
Date Posted: 19 June 2008 at 9:07pm
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Apparently in countries that do allow it the majority use it to 'conceive' a girl which I thought was interesting. I also think it would be a slippery slope and it does seem like messing with nature a bit too much- but then again, if I had of had boys I think I would quite possibly be looking into it to get a girl. Actually, to be totally honest, I know I would have without a doubt. I desperately desperately wanted a girl at some point and I remember being so so relieved that Charlotte was a girl, it meant I didn't have to 'worry' about not having one.
So what about people who design babies to help a sick sibling? I'm reading 'My sisters keeper' at the moment and its really really interesting seeing the situation from the child POV. I always thought it was horrid, then I had kids and realised I would do anything to save them- but then again it seems so cruel for the spare part child. ------------- Jen, Charlotte 7 & Kate 3 
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Posted By: Candkids
Date Posted: 20 June 2008 at 8:53pm
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i think designer babies are just outright wrong!!!!
but i think choosing the sex for ivf babies is ok only as i have a friend , he has 6 brothers the last 2 were ivf and finally his mum had a girl she was sooooooo over the moon. their little girl died in an accident, it was heartwrenching for all of them. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">  DD 10.5yrs DS 6yrs DS 11mths 5 little angles watching from above |
Posted By: rorylex
Date Posted: 23 June 2008 at 3:25pm
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i think sex selection should be allowed to couples who are going through ivf for infertility reasons most of them proberbly arnt bothered about sex anyway,
however i dont think couples should be able to go through ivf just for sex selection. though after 3 boys it is tempting but id still be happy if i had 6 boys. me and dp talked about it and we thought it would cost 10-20k just to do ivf for that much we could of had 3 more kids and 1 might of been a girl. id rather have 3 more boys than pay so much for the possible girl ------------- Mummy to 4 boys Samuel - 18.6.05 Rory - 15.7.06 Mason - 13.06.08 Emmett - 24.01.10 Baby #5 - cooking |
Posted By: Mazzy
Date Posted: 23 June 2008 at 3:57pm
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I worked on a research project on this topic, it was really interesting to see people's opinions and made me think hard about what I thought about it all. I was working on it while pregnant with DD1 so it really struck home with me!
For a lot of people it comes down to where you consider life to start - is that little embryo or blastocyst a life or not? Personally, my gut tells me I'm against choosing gender. I guess my view is if it isn't broken, don't fix it. Even for those going through IVF for fertility reasons, I don't think it should be allowed - then there are all sorts of arguments about why some are allowed it when others aren't. I don't like the idea of manipulation when it comes to procreation. I think IVF is a blessing for those with fertility problems, but mixed up in that is the knowledge that unused embryos are destroyed, like Ginger talked about. I can see the logic and benefit behind allowing gender selection for genetic medical conditions, but also can't see how it can have boundaries put on it to be fair, so think it probably shouldn't happen. Muh. I can't form my thoughts properly today, I will come back later when I have a better brain! ------------- Mum to two gorgeous girls! |
Posted By: NeoshasMummy
Date Posted: 23 June 2008 at 4:35pm
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I wouldn/t personally do it but in saying that I wouldn't judge someone who did make that decision. ------------- https://secure.fertilityfriend.com/home/30c4ec/" rel="nofollow">  Mrs Te Kani ❤️ Neosha 26/5/2007 |
Posted By: Kels
Date Posted: 23 June 2008 at 5:39pm
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I am totally against it. I agree with what Fiona said. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
Busy mum to Miss 15yrs, Miss 10yrs and Master 4yrs |
Posted By: Candkids
Date Posted: 25 June 2008 at 2:20pm
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im ok with ivf parents being able to choose the sex. but im SOOOOOOO against the designer baby thing tho, thats stepping way over the line. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> DD 10.5yrs DS 6yrs DS 11mths 5 little angles watching from above |
Posted By: mandz
Date Posted: 25 June 2008 at 5:40pm
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I'm not "for" it as such, but I don't have an issue with couples who wish to do it as part of IVF. I have a little boy who I love more than anything, but next time around I really hope I have a girl! However whatever we are blessed with will be loved unconditionally so I wouldn't personally go down that road.
I am with Jess, I wouldn't judge someone who chose to do it. Amanda ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
Zack Robert Henton - 29th December 2009 |
Posted By: kiwigal
Date Posted: 26 June 2008 at 3:59pm
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I also think it wrong. We went through IUI and asked our specialist if you can choose the sex of the baby and he said they can get done for malpractice. At the end of the day it shouldn't matter if it was a boy or a girl as long he/she is healthy. |