jealousy
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Category: Have A Baby?
Forum Name: Kindy and Beyond
Forum Description: So you've survived the sleepless nights and toddler tantrums, now the fun really begins! Talk to other parents of older children here!
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=29828
Printed Date: 23 November 2024 at 3:47pm
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Topic: jealousy
Posted By: Kazzle
Subject: jealousy
Date Posted: 10 November 2009 at 8:07am
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In the last week we have noticed that Rhiannon has suddenly become very possessive and jealous of Kent.
If i am playing with Cory, she will come over and play but is nice about it, and then goes off and does her own thing, but if Kent is playing with Cory then she gets in his face, and gets rough with Cory and then starts jumping all over Kent and keeps calling out "daddy daddy daddy" We do realise that part of this is because for the last 3 yrs, she has had daddys undivided attention, but how do we get her to realise that we dont love her any less, but we cant give her all our attention as Cory is just as important as well....and if she is like this now, whats going to happen if we have another one. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Replies:
Posted By: Kazzle
Date Posted: 11 November 2009 at 8:07am
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So does anyone have any suggestions??? ------------- http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Rachael21
Date Posted: 12 November 2009 at 1:39pm
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Um is he having lots of one on one time with her?
Af he is and she is still acting like this you need to deal with it like it was any other bad behaviour. I personally would sit down and explain to her like "I know you want to play with Daddy but he is playing with Cory, I know you are sad because you want to play but he will play with you after" or something along those lines and then try and distract her or let her join in. I believe at this age they cannot control their emotions so we have to do it for them. I say what is expected of Jack but don't expect him to actually do it but he will learn what is expected of him eventually. If Jack kept crying and carrying on in a situation like that I would say "Ok we don't want to play with someone who won't play nicely" and walk away. when he is ready to play nicely he can join us. Most of the time the carry on is because something they don't like is happening and they cannot control how they feel. Hope that kind of helps? |
Posted By: nicolaann
Date Posted: 13 November 2009 at 8:04am
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Other than what Rach has said, the only other thing I can think of is giving her something of her own so she can feel special. We gave Alex a thomas train set, that is set up away from where they normally play, so Sophie is not allowed to play with it. Alex knows it is just for him as he is a big boy. We make a big deal out of him being the big boy, and being able to do some things Sophie can not do yet, it helps him to feel special when she is getting a lot of attention. Then when Sophie is getting one on one time with Dh or me, he has other things he can go and do, and he is quite happy with that. A special book is another great one (and much cheaper)
I would try and talk to her though. Its a hard one, but she will learn (and pretty quickly) thet she has to share mummy and daddy now, and she will soon start playing nicely. Good luck!! ------------- Nicky, Mum to Alex (5) & Sophie (3) http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Candkids
Date Posted: 23 November 2009 at 5:22pm
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i agree with the above
we had the same issues with sarah it took a while and the green eyed monster still comes out from time to time, but we made sure that she & dh had there time togeather to do things without jett around and also the 3 of them too, we explained to her that she had to let jett have some "fun time" with dh too and how as he was a baby he cant run around and play etc and he didnt understand why she was getting so angry and frustreted at him and that when he was older he would want to play with her all the time and now 2yrs later its definatly doubble troubble at our place although she does still get jealous of things good luck  ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">  DD 10.5yrs DS 6yrs DS 11mths 5 little angles watching from above |