Why can’t I find motivation?
Printed From: OHbaby!
Category: Support
Forum Name: Coping with infertility
Forum Description: Have you been trying to conceive unsuccessfully? Dealing with primary or secondary infertility? Get support, advice, and help coping here.
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=32686
Printed Date: 21 November 2024 at 10:47pm
Software Version: Web Wiz Forums 12.05 - http://www.webwizforums.com
Topic: Why can’t I find motivation?
Posted By: tischler
Subject: Why can’t I find motivation?
Date Posted: 06 April 2010 at 4:50pm
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Hi everyone, just wondering if anyone else is in the same boat, and whether you are or not, if you're needing to lose some weight - can you be my motivational team??
I need to ideally lose 10kg but 5kg would be fab (actually I'd love to lose 20kg but let's just get real!!). As you can see from my signature I'm going through the IVF process. Weirdly as it seems I can't find the motivation to lose weight. I don't 'need to' from a IVF transfer process but any weight loss (as my specialist says) would be better for pregnancy, and I know I do need to crack on and lose it. So why, when I desperately want to be pregnant, can I not find the motivation to lose weight (i.e. eat healthy and exercise). [The same thing happened before my wedding - just couldn't find it]. The questions I keep posing to myself, is .... am I using my weight as an excuse? I.e. if I was thinner and healthier and I still couldn't get pregnant then I wouldn't have any other reason but this way it's not 'me' failing due to infertility .................... I don't know - and I don't actually know if I've even made sense here!!! So I'm hoping that as of next week, once I get sorted with food buying etc and exercise planning, that I'll start ... see already delayed it! Any ideas on how to kick start a good habit??? ------------- 5 IVF/ICSI Cycles - 10 embryo's, 8 transfers, all BFN's. Our journey to parenthood is over, and we join the unfortunate many for whom IVF does not work. |
Replies:
Posted By: frankie
Date Posted: 06 April 2010 at 6:06pm
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Hey Tischler, I can sooo identify with what you are saying. Throughout my life I've really struggled with my weight and always thought I'd lose weight for my wedding, did I, no. Then when I started TTC and nothing happened, we went along to FA and the specialist told me that losing weight may help, even before that everything I read told me that my weight could affect my chances of conception, did I do anything about it, no. Then every month when I got a BFN I would blame my weight and hate myself for not sticking to my healthy eating regime. I was incredulous of the fact that despite how much I wanted a baby, I couldn't stop my bad eating habits even for that.
I wonder if I have used my weight as an excuse for things not happening, as you are suggesting. It is such a deep psychological thing for some of us that it would not surprise me. One day something clicked for me, I can't really explain what it was. But the conclusion I came to is that I was not going to lose weight because it might help me to conceive, I was going to lose weight because I wanted to. I really do think that to lose weight, you have to want to for yourself, not because of some event or a potential medical implication, no matter how much you might want to be slim for that event or to overcome your potential medical issue. I lost 6 kgs in 5 weeks and got my BFP from first round of IUI. Since then I am just concentrating on eating healthily vs losing weight. I am about 20 kgs overweight still so will tackle that after bubba arrives methinks! Don't know if this helps you but just thought I'd let you know that you are not the only one who feels this way. Good luck with your FET, really hope you get your little miracle soon. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">  
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Posted By: kebakat
Date Posted: 06 April 2010 at 6:12pm
| With weightloss join the weightloss thread. I've lost 30kg + all up (going from 99kg to 67.9kg and I got all compedative in my own mind and wanted to stay smaller than lilfatty for as long as I could. That worked for me. Being accountable on there was good for me. I didnt wanna be on the list with my numbers going no where. |
Posted By: tischler
Date Posted: 07 April 2010 at 5:20pm
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Thanks kebakat - I think you may have suggested this to me in the past as well. Maybe I'm just too chicken.
Though in saying that I ate some lollies today and immediately felt ick afterwards - I keep thinking of the ad "the sign, the sign" and maybe it was my sign to get sorted. Contemplating starting another thread for IVF'ers trying to lose weight .... I figure there'd be far less people, and the weightloss thread seems so overwhelming. Somehow going through IVF and trying to lose weight to get pg is different - maybe I just feel we're 'special' and I'm discriminating - sorry if I am. Hmmm, I'll give myself another day and have another squiz at the weightloss thread to see if I'm game enough ........... Thanks for your comments! ------------- 5 IVF/ICSI Cycles - 10 embryo's, 8 transfers, all BFN's. Our journey to parenthood is over, and we join the unfortunate many for whom IVF does not work. |
Posted By: oscarboo
Date Posted: 07 April 2010 at 8:52pm
Come and join us in the weight loss thread. I'm currently there but not doing too well . I have all the weight I gained going through IVF and my pregnancy to lose. I know what you mean about finding it hard to find the motivation some times. I'm a little like that at the mo! Just trying small steps at a time at the moment.------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">  
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Posted By: chick98
Date Posted: 16 April 2010 at 8:21am
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I so know what you mean about finding motivation! I fully admit the infertility thing got me so down that I could not face failing at weight loss as well!
Eventually I joined WW online because I was too ashamed to go to any meetings or to be obviously dieting. The first 500g I lost felt like the first success I experienced in my life for ages. That motivated me! |
Posted By: sarahd
Date Posted: 22 April 2010 at 8:08am
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I hear you.
I feel like I have given up coffee, alcohol and now have to give up other things as well to lose, and you see women around that get pregnant doing all of these things. Anyway....life isn't fair, so I have decided that "diets" don't work and have tried implementing other things...I bought Healthy Food Magazine and working a lot from that (recipes I mean). Trying to put exercise as first priority and when I feel unmotivated, just look at my thighs and that helps me go to class! If you're thinking of starting a thread I'd join in. (separate to the other one). |
Posted By: tischler
Date Posted: 22 April 2010 at 10:13am
Hiya, thread has started - IVF and those kg's  ------------- 5 IVF/ICSI Cycles - 10 embryo's, 8 transfers, all BFN's. Our journey to parenthood is over, and we join the unfortunate many for whom IVF does not work. |
Posted By: RebeccaPennell
Date Posted: 04 November 2013 at 4:20pm
| So understand. I was in the same boat. We were on the IVF waiting list and still trying to conceive naturally. We went to a natural fertility consultant and she asked me hard and fast, what was important. I said, losing weight, getting pregnant. She said really? It doesn't look like it. If those ARE your priorities, you need to make it happen. I did lose weight and I did actually conceive naturally. However, my story doesn't stop there as I'm now 40 kilos heavier. I'm finally losing weight now that I've changed my attitude towards food. I want to be around for a long time for my kids and I want to be a good role model. I've started investigating "healthy eating" and suddenly I'm loving what I'm putting into my body - and the weight has started to come off. Don't focus on the weight! Look at your lifestyle. What do you eat? How active are you? How active will you be when you have kids? What do you want them to eat? Find something that works for you, and make that your daily habit. And love what you do! |
Posted By: Hardisson262712
Date Posted: 17 May 2021 at 1:49pm
| To be honest, I have always had doubts about getting motivation from the coaches... Does it work? |
Posted By: Debbies269427
Date Posted: 05 September 2021 at 4:55pm
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Yoga helped me lose my weight in a way that didn't require a lot of motivation. Yoga burns calories quite easily when done the right way. If you are serious about losing weight and getting fit, you might want to implement a 60-minute power yoga and/or vinyasa flow practice at least five to six days per week. https://yogaweightloss365.com/" rel="nofollow - This yoga weight loss program was easy to follow and worked for me during my pregnancy when I started gaining too much weight. Each class is easy to follow, but is varied and enjoyable. Dynamic Sequencing means you'll always be challenged regardless of your current level. If you want to follow my example, think about coupling your practice with a whole foods diet for optimal results. Good luck! Mandy |