So it looks like I have to...
Printed From: OHbaby!
Category: Support
Forum Name: Life After Miscarriage
Forum Description: Up to one in five pregnancies ends in miscarriage, yet for many the loss of a pregnancy is isolating and lonely. Share your thoughts and feelings here with others who have experienced loss.
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7265
Printed Date: 05 December 2024 at 2:26am
Software Version: Web Wiz Forums 12.05 - http://www.webwizforums.com
Topic: So it looks like I have to...
Posted By: Maya
Subject: So it looks like I have to...
Date Posted: 04 May 2007 at 8:53pm
Bury baby next weekend  It's something I guess I know I 'have' to do but at the same time there's a sense of closure about it that I'm not sure if I'm ready for just yet.
We were undecided whether to bury her at the urupa with Willie's parents, brothers and niece, or whether to bury her on the family land, but now the whanau are getting the ground at the urupa ready for the unveiling of Jim and Mona's stones in September, and Willie wants to put baby down there. They're turning the soil next weekend and having the edging put in a few days later. I like the idea of her being with her grandparents, especially as Willie's dad passed away when I was carrying Maya so he's always seemed like a bit of a guardian angel for our kids, and it's consecrated ground, but at the same time it's so final. I know I need to get over it, and to be honest I haven't actually had her out of the bedside drawer in months (altho I might a bit later on, feeling a little sad  ) but I just don't know if I'm ready to let go.
Sorry, just thinking out loud. -------------  Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Replies:
Posted By: busymum
Date Posted: 04 May 2007 at 8:58pm
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Is there something you could have as a reminder instead? Pot plant? Pretty diary? Something on the mantle? ------------- |
Posted By: AlyAyde
Date Posted: 04 May 2007 at 9:12pm
 oh hun, that will be lovely though to have her with her GP hey. ------------- Jayde 25/12/04 Alyssa 08/04/03 http://Alyayde.bebo.com |
Posted By: fattartsrock
Date Posted: 04 May 2007 at 9:17pm
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------------- The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P |
Posted By: mum2paris
Date Posted: 04 May 2007 at 9:21pm
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Aw Emma, that is so sad and yet so nice to be placing her there with them.
As yet i am actually dreading them tellin gme that the histology reports are done and i can go get my baby.. i have no idea how i will be. I hope that next weekend goes as well as it can. Will it be saturday or sunday.. on mother's day? I spose if it was possible it would maybe be better if it wasn't mother's day, just to save future mother's days being a bit of a sadder day so to speak. Anyway. big hugs to you. ------------- Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja 
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Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 04 May 2007 at 9:41pm
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Probably Sunday. I had already committed to go up north to see my grandparents for the weekend, so will probably come home earlyish Sun morning and do it then. I want to let some balloons go, and write her a letter to put down with her, so I need to get that organised. I want to play Nickelbacks "Far Away" as well. Willie is just sort of "whatever you want dear" about it, I wish he'd tell me what he's thinking (wishful thinking, he never does).
Teresa, I think I will do something to remember baby by, I'm planning to get a tattoo, but still thinking of an appropriate design. Maybe a baby bracelet the same as the one Maya and the gremlins have, that way I can keep it in my memory box with the scan pics and pathology reports etc. ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: james
Date Posted: 04 May 2007 at 10:32pm
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------------- <a href="http://lilypie.com"><img src="http://b4.lilypie.com/nLJ5p13.png" alt="Lilypie 4th Birthday Ticker" border="0" /></a> |
Posted By: ooEvaoo
Date Posted: 05 May 2007 at 12:18am
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Awwww I think that is such a precious idea Emma @ bracelet. I hope you don't mind me asking..but how old was your Anahera?. That is such a beautiful name you have for her and so appropriate.
I really commend you all for having the strength and bravery to talk about your little angels. God must have loved them too much to let them go. I know that my older sisters have had MC but they never shared how it had affected them. I know that if I was ever to go through something like this I wouldn't want to bottle any hurt up. This forum is going to allow so many mothers, and possibly fathers the chance to heal their hearts, and to know that they are not alone. ------------- 
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Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 05 May 2007 at 11:50am
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I was 7 weeks pregnant, but baby had stopped growing at 5w5d. ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: SMoody
Date Posted: 05 May 2007 at 7:28pm
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Emma will be thinking of you. Hugs. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: caraMel
Date Posted: 05 May 2007 at 7:30pm
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I'll be thinking of you Emma and sending you all lots of love and prayers. I hope it is a really precious day ------------- Mel, Mummy to E: 6, B: 4 and: 
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Posted By: Bubbaloo
Date Posted: 05 May 2007 at 8:55pm
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We will be thinking of you Emma big for Sunday. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">  Was danni-chick Mum to James My Angel 28/07/08 |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 05 May 2007 at 11:10pm
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Not tomorrow Sunday, next Sunday. I need a week to get my thoughts together! I have been thinking on the tattoo design tho. I had the box out of the drawer yesterday and it has an inlaid triple twist design in the lid, and inside the box is a little sheet that tells you about the design - it's a Maori symbol of eternity and lives entwined. So I'm thinking of getting a stylised version of that with the date and possibly the name we gave bub. I really like the meaning, and also the fact that the box with the symbol on it will be buried with bub but I'll always have a part of it with me. ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: mum2paris
Date Posted: 06 May 2007 at 12:07am
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That sounds really good Emma, ties it all together, and ties you to baby. ------------- Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja
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Posted By: my2angels
Date Posted: 06 May 2007 at 9:06am
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Thats a nice idea Emma. I got my tattoo on Friday so now I have my two living angels and stars to represent my two lost angels.
Its so nice to hear that you and Janine are getting/got your baby back. When i said i told people I was getting mind they thought i was crazy. I just didnt like the idea of them being destroyed like they were nothing. Oh and Janine I got my mum to go collect my "unwanted products of conception" as they were called, I couldnt do it. |