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Steven100874
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Joined: 04 December 2012
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Topic: Help a guy out, plz Posted: 04 December 2012 at 3:28pm |
My ex says her last period was oct 29th, 2011, conceived around nov 11th,and had a due date of september 3. but We also had a friend due Sep 4th and her Dr told her she conceived December 10th, so to me it doesn't make sense on what she'saying. she had her on august 31 and weighed 6lbs. I don't think it can be mine b/c I moved out Nov. 20th, and to me if she really conceived nov 11th her due date woould have been way sooner, especially since our friend KNEW what day she conceived for a fact.
She wont let me even see the kid so someone please help me out.
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Talz
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Joined: 13 February 2012
Location: Waikato
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Posted: 04 December 2012 at 4:00pm |
I had my last period on Oct 29th 2011 as well. But my due date was 4th August, and had my baby on 6th August 2012 ( I don't know what date I 'conceived' as such but must have been around 5-10 Nov 2011). So her due date can't have been right - well what she told you anyway. I think she is playing you along...... - Good luck!
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steven22
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Posted: 04 December 2012 at 4:11pm |
thank you! every way i know how to figure it, its not mine but just needed some other opinions. just hope to get the money for a lawyer soon so i know for sure. i would just hate to have a child and never get a chance to meet them. shes been telling several other guys its "their child" also so I agree and think she's just messing with my head.
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Tissy
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Joined: 20 September 2011
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Posted: 04 December 2012 at 8:37pm |
I think she's got her dates wrong somewhere along the way, or she has VERY liong cycles (the time between periods)
this is the stats based on due date:Your due date: Mon, September 3rd ,2012Ovulation date: Mon, December 12th ,2011 (so period would have been Nov 28th if a 28 day cycle) Conception date: Mon, December 12th ,2011 Implantation date: Wed, December 21st ,2011 Due date: Mon, September 3rd ,2012
This is the stats based on her 'period' date:Your due date: Sat, August 4th ,2012Last menstrual period: Sat, October 29th ,2011 Ovulation date: Fri, November 11th ,2011 Conception date: Sat, November 12th ,2011 Implantation date: Sun, November 20th ,2011 Due date: Sat, August 4th ,2012
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steven22
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Posted: 05 December 2012 at 3:43am |
Thanks Tiger-froglet. I think she does have longer cycles sometimes but she was pretty irregular it seemed. And if she had it that long wouldn't that push back the conception date as well? I just don't see her being mine
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Droplet
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Joined: 31 January 2012
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Posted: 05 December 2012 at 7:32am |
Well, I can see this as being very likely...... My last period was the 4th October 2011, we conceived the 12th November (and yes I am VERY sure of my dates as we had to keep a record due to medical reasons - very irregular and longer just like her). Baby due the 26th August 2012 and he arrived the 23rd..... He was a large bub at 8lb 7oz but really I think that the size of the baby has nothing to do with it, My friend had her baby 3 weeks early and she was an 8lb'er....... Hope that this helps somewhat....
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KateMcGrath
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Posted: 05 December 2012 at 3:01pm |
Ask for a paternity test and be willing to pay for it on the proviso that it is infact proven to be your baby. Get it sorted now. No matter what she says it is better to know for sure now that to drag it out over the years and then find out you have either missed out on your child's childhood or have been supporting someone else's kid. Either way good luck for a positive outcome.
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Katie101359
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Joined: 11 December 2012
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Posted: 11 December 2012 at 1:01pm |
Hi a paternity test (DNA) one anyway would give a definate answer but it costs $1800. As for a lawyer if you are a student or on low income etc. you can get legal aid.
The way they calculate pregnancy dates can be complicated. One thing I suggest is that the first ultrasound is usually acurate to a few days about the date of conception. With my daughter I conceived her 4 and a half days after ovulation as we were trying for a girl. (boy sperm swim faster but die sooner so it helps the chances of having a boy if you conceive around ovulation but later gives girl sperm more chance)we did it only once so I'm sure of my dates and the ultrasound was only off by 3 days (possibly because I conceived after ovulation)the earlier the ultrasound the more accurate as as babies get bigger there is a variation in sizes.
If you and her have different blood types then finding out babies blood type is cheaper than DNA but not conclusive that the child would be yours (but could rule out paternity). If you do the DNA test it is collected by mouth swab in baby and blood tests from the parents.
Regrdless of anything try to stay calm, be friendly to the mum (even if you are confused and hurt) and if you get the chance to see the child, take an interest, kids need people that love them.
Don't walk away unless you are 1) really sure the child is not yours or 2) you honestly think the child is in a happy situation and you are not wanting to be involved.
If you don't want to be a Dad it is better to leave now then break their heart later, if however you think you can give it a good shot and want to try to make it work go for it. Kids are awesome. Watch the video clip on OH baby about being a Dad it is awesome and that is what a cool dad is like.
Good luck!!
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LateStarterLorna
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Joined: 12 March 2010
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Posted: 11 December 2012 at 8:14pm |
Just on the dna test, not sure about court ordered ones, but you can purchase the stuff off the internet and send the samples back to them and then they email you with the results and it only costs about $300, have done it myself so I know thats correct :)
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Gamerj
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Posted: 11 December 2012 at 8:26pm |
Hey, it may be that she is setting you up for the child support factor... If she did not name the father on the birth certificate, WINZ will deduct about $20 a week from her pay packet, unless she states who the father is. Not sure where you are from but there are a number of community law centres around who provide free/by donation assistance/advice/representation on this (its called a 'paternity matter' within the family law field) ... check out www.communitylaw.org.nz to find your local law centre and there is heaps of info on there as well.
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Naughty116787
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Posted: 16 May 2013 at 6:28pm |
Baby due the 26th August 2012 and he arrived the 23rd..... He was a large bub at 8lb 7oz but really I think that the size of the baby has nothing to do with it, My friend had her baby 3 weeks early and she was an 8lb'er....... Hope that this helps somewhat.... ------------------------- cheap animal costumesfancy dress cat costume
Edited by Naughty116787 - 16 May 2013 at 6:29pm
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