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kebakat View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote kebakat Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 April 2009 at 3:47pm
It's almost been a month already!
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mummy_becks View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote mummy_becks Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 April 2009 at 3:54pm

I know Stace I was thinking about that today when I was looking at the calendar for dates. I so hope the thing I have ordered for you and Rich arrives soon - Fingers crossed for Thursday.

I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived!
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CuriousG View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote CuriousG Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 April 2009 at 3:58pm
Wow, that went really quick. I hope that things are starting to make more sense now and that you are feeling better too. Still thinking of you!

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Saffy View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Saffy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 29 April 2009 at 7:01pm
Hi Stacey,

I don't really know much about you except what I've been reading here over the last month and really feeling for you. Boy has my heart churned for you - sometimes life sends the hardest things one's way and it makes no sense at all. Having lost my son, I get the whole can't be f'd, messy house, things not normal around you thing... and you know what? It really REALLY doesn't matter. Because nothing is normal. What happened wasn't fair, wasn't part of your grand plan and certainly alters your sense of reality. The only thing that matters is that you keep yourself safe and take one day at a time and keep talking. Survive on bananas if the thought of time in the kitchen is beyond you... I think I lived on toast for a long time!

Grief counselling helped me a bit. Of course I didn't think I needed to do that for ages until after the event. What I did do though was go to some SANDS meetings and they are brilliant. The reason they're so great is that you can talk about Jared to your heart's content and the people there will get it. They won't offer you trite comments or feel awkward, or ask you when you're trying again blah blah blah.... they'll just take you for you.

As for the medics asking you when you're going to try again - give them the swift f'off. Sometimes I think they think they're helping. I know that I found that extra painful because I didn't want to think about going thru that experience again and certainly resented them for prodding me on the subject. It felt incredibly invasive.

Seriously though, give a SANDS meeting a try. It really gives perspective that there is a community of people out there who 'get' your hurt and will give you an avenue to vent all your frustrations and hurt.

Take care.
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Jessica View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Jessica Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 30 April 2009 at 10:55am
Good advice Saffy, I found SANDS really good as well


Our con-joined boys 20 wk
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kebakat View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote kebakat Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 30 April 2009 at 11:08am
Thanks for the advice but I really want nothing to do with counselling or sands. I have a friend who is a psychologist if I really need something but its really really really not me at all. DH has had contact with a social worker and that works for him but yeah totally not me or something I feel comfy with. I have a good mate who I talk to about crap when I need to who thinks the same way I do about alot of things in life so that is handy cause he seems to get where I'm coming from better than most.
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Sarahlou View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Sarahlou Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 30 April 2009 at 12:12pm
Stacey Im totally with you on that one... although SANDS is great and Im sure they help out a lot of people... but its either your thing or its not..... Keep on talking to that mate, It sounds like thats the thing for you... funny enough it worked for me too... my mate just happend to be my DH

Take care
Sarahlou






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