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AN E
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Topic: My rollercoaster ride Posted: 21 May 2008 at 1:04am |
OK, so it's been a busy and stressful last few weeks. Here is a run-down of my diary:
Thur 1 May:
Took DD to doctor for a cold, and realised that I hadn't had AF. Not too sure on dates, but I was regular, and it hadn't turned up. Pregnancy test came back negative. Kind of glad, as only just getting back into working 3 days a week, and DD is full-on.
Fri 9 May
Still no AF. HPT - I'm pregnant!!!! Shock!!!!! What to tell DH??? Told DH after cooking him a nice meal that night. Both in shock, but happy. Plans on what we need to get, re-arrange house etc...
Tues 13 May
Got up to DD in middle of the night and noticed some spotting. A little concerned, but went back to bed. Not much I could do.
Wed 14 May
A bit more spotting and period like cramps. Didn't think the pregnancy was going to stick.
Both DH and I were having a very busy and stressful week at work as we were due to fly to the USA for a holiday on Friday. So we had lots of things to tie up before we left. I worked really late at home on Wed night, and then popped into work on Thurs to hand over.
Thur 15
Made an appt to see doctor about the spotting. She thought that it sounded like a miscarriage and that there was nothing we could do. Sent me for some bloods on Thurs with results due first thing Fri. I kind of pushed for a scan as well, just to make sure as I wanted to make sure I was ok to travel.
Fri 16
Doctor rang - according to my dates, (which were not accurate), the levels were in the bottom 5th percentile. So she indicated that things didn't look good for a viable pregnancy.
Scan at 11am. Possible ectopic pregnancy
At this stage I had to send DH home with a tired and hungry DD. We had only gone out to do the scan, and were then meant to be getting ready to go to the airport. So we had nothing in the bag!
It started getting scary at this point, I was not allowed home. The only place for me to go was the hospital.
Mum, who was also meant to be flying out with us, was told and came to look after DD, so DH could be with me. I was kept in close range at the hospital, and by 6pm was in surgery.
Came home on Monday, with some stitches. But it's going to be the emotional scarring that is going to take a while to heal.
***In memory of my baby that I will never get to know***
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Kazzle
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Location: Porirua
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Posted: 21 May 2008 at 7:41am |
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Vanillabean
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Posted: 21 May 2008 at 7:46am |
So so sorry to hear about this.
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5x mc, Jan 08, June 08, Nov 08, May 09, April 11
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kebakat
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Location: Palmy North
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Posted: 21 May 2008 at 8:17am |
I'm so sorry Annie!!!!!
PM me if you wanna chat since I went through an ectopic though I don't know what the surgery part is like.
Hope you are on the mend!
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Glow
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Posted: 21 May 2008 at 8:24am |
Sorry to hear
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Mummy of Two Boys B: 2004 K: 2007
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caraMel
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Posted: 21 May 2008 at 8:25am |
I'm so, so sorry!
Sending you and your family lots of thoughts and prayers xx
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Mel, Mummy to E: 6, B: 4 and:
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cuppatea
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Posted: 21 May 2008 at 9:10am |
I'm so sorry AN E
Take care
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Freesia
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Posted: 21 May 2008 at 9:28am |
I'm so sorry to hear this AN E I'm thinking of you and your family
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Bobbie
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Posted: 21 May 2008 at 11:12am |
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ElfsMum
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Posted: 21 May 2008 at 11:14am |
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Mum to two amazing boys!
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katie1
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Posted: 21 May 2008 at 12:54pm |
Am so sorry. Thinking of you.
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Jay_R
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Posted: 21 May 2008 at 2:18pm |
Am really sorry for your loss. It's just as hard when they go so early.
Big hugs.
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Rachael21
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Posted: 21 May 2008 at 2:28pm |
Aww so sorry Ann
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Maya
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Posted: 23 May 2008 at 4:18pm |
Big hugs An E.
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Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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AN E
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Posted: 24 May 2008 at 1:12pm |
I don't get it. DH doesn't seem that phased at what happened. He's glad that I am still around and the DD still has a mummy (ie glad that I didn't die). But he doesn't understand that we lost the baby, and that I am still upset about that.
On a side note - I had my stitches out yesterday OMFG that hurt!!!!! Glad I was under a general when they put them in.
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kebakat
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Posted: 24 May 2008 at 1:15pm |
He must just think differently to you. DH and I think the same and once we found out it was an ectopic we didn't see it as a baby, we saw it as a cancer which I think helped with our state of mind. I hope he gives you lots of hugs and support though! And lots of chocie!
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cuppatea
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Posted: 24 May 2008 at 1:28pm |
Men don't become attached to the pregnancy early on like we do. I know that with our mc DH was sad that we had lost the baby but he was devasted like I was. He also said some silly things, not to be mean, but just because he was trying to make me feel better but getting it all wrong.
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mummyofprinces
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Posted: 24 May 2008 at 8:09pm |
My DH pretended not to care. He was trying to stay strong for me. I caught him bawling his eyes out on the phone to his brother. He also found it easy to deal with that way.
I explained that knowing he was upset really helped, more than him staying "strong". Having said that, my man is no bloke. He is a giant mummy's boy, through and through.
Maybe your DH is just trying to stay strong so you can grieve.
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emachan
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Posted: 25 May 2008 at 8:58pm |
hugs AN E, my DH is still the same about our m/c last year and doesn't understand why I can't 'get over it'.
I think its just cos it wasn't their body that was carrying the baby and they couldn't really 'bond' with anything.
Hopefully he'll come around soon, try talking to him about how you feel and see if that helps?
*hugs* again!
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DD#1 Sept 08 DD#2 Oct 09
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AN E
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Posted: 25 May 2008 at 10:04pm |
Thanks all.
I have tried talking with DH and he admits that he doesn't understand. It's not fair, I'm not my usual happy self, and when he asks what's the matter I either break down in tears or try and 'clam' up. He just wants me to get over it, but I have tried to tell him that I need some time and space to grieve. It's hard for me, cause we have always understood each other - up until now.
Good news tho. My surgeon rang last night. the biopsy of the tube removed was inconclusive - meaning that the ectopic pregnancy was by chance. So the remaining tube should be fine. Still absolutely petrified of getting pregnant again tho.
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