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Nicky08
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Location: New Zealand
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Topic: Newly Sinlge... Posted: 13 October 2005 at 8:13pm |
heya its been a while since i've written on here, been extra busy. Kyan is doing very well growing soo fast hes a little fatty, hes sick at the moment they think he might have asthma! not what i wanted to hear! I am now a single parent kyans dad left us about 2 months ago we still c him quite often but its still hard. i know now how solo mothers do it! its hard coping all by yourself knowing theres no dad u can call out to if u just need a break.
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AlyAyde
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Joined: 02 September 2003
Location: Whangarei
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Posted: 13 October 2005 at 8:57pm |
Hi Nicky, great to hear that Kyan is growing so well! poor wee mite getting asthma, Alyssa gets it when she has a cold, the cough and weeze is horrible. I cant beleive he is 7 months already man time has flown. I'm sorry to hear that you and his dad arnt together anymore.
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Jayde 25/12/04
Alyssa 08/04/03
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Xander&Harmony
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Location: Palmerston North
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Posted: 13 October 2005 at 9:44pm |
awww Nicky,sorry to hear u and Kyans dad rnt together anymore.big hugs.
wow Kyans 7 mnths already!!!! hasnt time flown by!!
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BECS
Angel Baby 10/07/09 (10wks4days)
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lizzle
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Location: New Zealand
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Posted: 13 October 2005 at 11:17pm |
I have asthma and my mum said it is just soo nasty to hear the wheeze. I spent a lot of time in the shower wtih the hot tap going, no under it, but the steam was great. Vicks baby balsam is good too. Put it on Kyan's back though, necause if he rubs it in his eyes it stings like hell!!
Also in the future you may want to watch his dairy intake as dairy can increase mucus which makes the asthma worse. i also can't take ANY pain medication apart from panadol, and have a shellfish allergy that apparently is related.
Sorry to hear about you and Kyan's dad!!
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Sarah hanna
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Posted: 14 October 2005 at 10:01am |
hi, dont the fathers have all the luck, my husband left 4 mnths ago, so it's just me and my three kids, Ty 7yrs, angel 3yrs and chloe 7mnths. he just picks them up when he wants and has good old time, stuffs them full of sugar, keeps them up late them sends them home grumpy. i've forgotten who i am, just to busy being mum!
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Angelme
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Posted: 14 October 2005 at 4:18pm |
Ahh less responsibility dears. See it's a males world lol.
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Xander&Harmony
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Posted: 14 October 2005 at 4:19pm |
ohh another good tip with balsalm is to put it on the soles of bubs feet as the vapour rises up thru their jammies and is not as strong if its on their chest or back ( not sure if thats a good thing or not??)
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BECS
Angel Baby 10/07/09 (10wks4days)
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mum2paris
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Location: Palmy
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Posted: 14 October 2005 at 4:23pm |
mum used to put it on a tissue and stick it between our singlets or in our jammies pocket.
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Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja
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mum2paris
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Posted: 14 October 2005 at 4:24pm |
Hey Nicky sorry to hear about you and Kyan's dad, take care of yourself - have you got other family that can give you a bit of time out sometimes?
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Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja
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nikkitheknitter
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Location: Westie
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Posted: 14 October 2005 at 10:01pm |
Hey Nicky... sucks about Kyan's dad!
I'm a single mum, sometimes it drives me nuts, other times it's cool to have Han to myself.
Make sure you surround yourself with positive people and good friends.
I've got a bunch of next door neighbours who are awesome and if I need company I just go over there and let Han run rampant in their house. They are great with her and let me have time out.
Stay close to your Mum as well. She seems like she loves Kyan so make the most of it
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k&jsmum
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Location: New Zealand
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Posted: 15 October 2005 at 12:10am |
Hey Nicky sad to hear about you and your ex partner. I am a solo mum of twin boys (turned 2 yesterday now - its just after midnight now sat morn didnt realise it was so late ) and at times it can do your head in but when they look up at me with so much love in their eyes i just melt. And it is hard when bubs is sick and dads not there for support. My eldest twin keegan was rushed to hospital last year (we lived out in the country 45min from town) as he collaped and was vomiting and going unconsious and i was angry at my ex for not being around. But i have the greatest of friends who just rallied around to support me so as long as you have support you will be fine. And in the end keegs was ok - it was suspected meningitus and he had to have a spinal tap (which was awful)poor dude but it ended up being a "virus" as per usual.
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Marlene
Keegan ~ 14 October 2003
Jaidyn ~ 14 October 2003
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Nicky08
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Location: New Zealand
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Posted: 30 October 2005 at 9:58pm |
Yea it is really hard with him just dropping in when he feels like it and promising to have kyan and then changing his mind at the last minute, but on the other hand its ok that hes not around cos i get to experience his first time crawling walking and talking and hes gonna miss that and one ay he'll regret it. Hes got another girlfriend now which sux cos he rubs that in my face, hes soo imature. Kyan is starting to move around he kan crawl for a couple of secs then just drops its sooo cute, hes such a happy boy, lotsa smiles all the time he has a really cheeky personality.He keeps getting ear infections now, grrr if its not one thing its the other!his wheezing has settled down alot he only has to have his puffer now and then which is good.
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Nicky08
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Posted: 30 October 2005 at 10:02pm |
I've got james's (my ex partner) mother and sister staying with me at the moment which is great i love the help they keep my house spotless its great! me and his mother are really close she just like a mum to me and his sister they stick up 4 me more than they do 4 james sometimes its great haha.everyone finds it weird we get along so well cos alot of ppl dont get along with there mother inlaws well my ex mother in law now, but i do its great
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k&jsmum
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Posted: 31 October 2005 at 12:10pm |
hey about your ex having a new girlfriend i say so what. Leon got a new girlfriend and wanted to start taking the boys away - which i said no too as they dont really know him. but i have come to the conclusion that guys do that - rush out and get a new woman and us left behind can feel quite lonely angry and sad but in the end we wont rush into silly relationships and when we do meet someone it will be because we are ready and the person will be kind and loving to us and our children so the wait will be worth it...just my thoughts but its what keeps me going sometimes
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Marlene
Keegan ~ 14 October 2003
Jaidyn ~ 14 October 2003
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preggy_sunflower
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Posted: 31 October 2005 at 12:26pm |
What is it with men? I like to call it "the great buggering off", where a whole generation of men seem to just up sticks and bugger off when the going gets tough. And yes, they do tend to get new partners fairly quickly, and my powers of deduction have figured out that it's for 3 reasons - 1: They can't be alone. 2: They think their willy will fall off if they don't use it 5 times a week; and 3: They're crap (well, some are). I have a friend who was deserted 6 weeks before giving birth to her first baby. He then decided to come back after 18 months, got her knocked up again, then legged it out the back way 2 weeks after her second son was born. What a star of a man.
You girls who do this alone are marvellous. I have all the respect in the world for you. Not only are you brave and strong, you are wonderful mothers and you are fabulous women too.
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Joshua Hadynn - Born 3 May 2006
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k&jsmum
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Posted: 31 October 2005 at 4:03pm |
hey nicky when i said so what i meant so what to them - they think they are the big man cos they can get a new g/f - and i do like your reasons as above - very true lol .
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Marlene
Keegan ~ 14 October 2003
Jaidyn ~ 14 October 2003
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HelenElla
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Posted: 31 October 2005 at 4:11pm |
When I was eight months pregnant with Chloe her dad started cheating on me and being 17 I was too scared to leave anyway he was never there and would never help with Chloe and would just complain when she cried. I knew he was still cheating and wouldn't come home for days at a time by the time Chloe was 10mths old I had got over my postnatal depression and realised I was silly for not telling him where to go sooner. It was very hard ajusting to the whole concept of being a single mum as well as all the stigma the goes with it(I was living in a small town). But when it came down to it I feel it bought me closer to my daughter as we only had each other which made me stronger as a mum.
Since then I moved to Napier and meet someone who has embraced us both and loves Chloe as his own which is very important. I has been a long road getting here but I stayed strong and now I'm the happiest I've ever been.
I really think that although sometimes hard it is so much better being a single mum rather than settling for second best.
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k&jsmum
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Posted: 31 October 2005 at 6:32pm |
just gotta ask - how did you meet someone??/ i am ready to get out there but alittle scared. and i know how it feels to catch your partner cheating - i caught the boys dad in the act twice while i was preggy as well as the dodgey text mess and emails all from diff woman. so have been pretty burnt. have been chatted up a couple of times on the rare occassions i go out but so not into meeting guys in the pub scene - they are just after a one nighter mostly. anyway let me know your secret
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Marlene
Keegan ~ 14 October 2003
Jaidyn ~ 14 October 2003
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Angelme
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Posted: 01 November 2005 at 10:48pm |
Ha ha ha good question, in this country where the women way out number the men. Sorry, been single for five years now, walked out of a crap 13 year marriage. Thought by going to Aus more ripe pickings, even if it is an ex kiwi lol
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HelenElla
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Posted: 02 November 2005 at 9:50am |
To be completely honest I didn't want to meet anyone in the least, after being in such a crappy relationship I was just enjoying being single and not being treated as some slave to man who never respected me.
Anyway I meet Josh because I had to get out of the tiny town of Blenheim because everyone knew everything about my private life so I came up to Napier with Chloe's aunty(her fathers sis) for a holiday and she is from here so knew some people and without saying anything to me her and one of her friends set me up on a blind date with Josh. Since we had both just come out of a long term relationship we both had to be bullied into going. Anyway we meet and I've never really believed in the idea of an instant connection with someone but that's what it was for us. We spent the entire night just talking and talking. We took things very slow as we were both scared of getting into another bad relationship. Eventually I let him meet Chloe and he was great with her, he loves kids and really embraced Chloe. It took Chloe a while to warm to him and we didn't really want to rush it as she had never had a positive male role in her life.
After a lot of trips for both of us between Blenheim and Napier I eventually decided to move up here for a fresh start. Chloe's father never made any contact with her and from what I can tell still wants nothing to do with her, he didn't even send her a b'day card! One strange thing that happened was one day when Chloe decided to call Josh "Dad" we had never refurred to him as that so it was quiet a shock but at this stage we were in a very soild relationship so we chose to accept it. Josh has been a wonderful dad to Chloe right from day one as well as treating me better than any man ever has.
I was never too sure that I would ever meet anyone who could accept Chloe as their own unconditionally which is very important to me. I knew Josh has always wanted two kids and I love kids so I thought "ok I don't mind having two kids to him" then a few weeks ago he said that once this baby is 3months old then he plans to get a vasectomy that is when I realised that he sees Chloe as 100% his own.
I think the only secret is that it will happen when you least expect it, just keep an open heart and you never know what might happen. Josh and I now have a baby due TODAY and have set a date for our wedding early in 2007. Life couldn't be better.
If it happened for me I'm sure it will happen for you too
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