Author |
Topic Search Topic Options
|
FionaS
Senior Member
Joined: 17 April 2007
Location: Auckland
Points: 5117
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Topic: Saying Please Posted: 19 November 2008 at 9:00pm |
Funny how I always seem to post multiple questions when Elle goes through a period of long nightwakings!
Does your toddler say please when they want something?
I'm sure Elle knows what please means. If I play a game where I say "can you say cat?" she says cat, "can you say dog" she says dog, "can you say please?" She says no and grins!
Whenever she asks for something she whines about it. I've been getting tough but she will not budge! So I guess I'm wondering if 2 is too early to say please?
|
Mummy to Gabrielle and Ashley
|
|
Sponsored Links
|
|
|
pomikiwi
Senior Member
Joined: 07 October 2008
Points: 1088
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 19 November 2008 at 9:21pm |
I always make DD say please and thankyou, I dont think it's ever to early to learn manners.
Most of the time she says it unprompted which is great.
|
DD-Carys Amelia 17.03.06
|
|
Rachael21
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: New Zealand
Points: 4700
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 19 November 2008 at 9:23pm |
Jack would never say please or thank you either. Even now he says it but still has to be reminded most of the time. Same with thank you, he does say excuse me a lot tho which is nice.
I think it doesn't really matter if they don't repeat it when asked its more that you get it into their head when is the time to be saying it and then eventually they will? I don't know I'm just hoping lol
|
|
kezplanet
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: Southbridge, Canterbury
Points: 1120
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 19 November 2008 at 10:12pm |
I don't think 2 is too early Fiona, by the sounds of it Elle knows exactly what you are talking about and it's just another way of 'playing' us mums!! It has been eaiser with Anastasia because "mother hen" Ashlyn does a lot of the teaching - good and bad, but we found it was just a matter of prompting the girls at the right time and not giving up - it has paid off for us and most of the time the girls use their manners except when trying to wind us up.
|
Kerryn, Mum to
Ashlyn(29/3/04), Anastasia(1/11/05) & Abigail (24/02/09)
|
|
Chickaboo
Senior Member
Joined: 12 November 2008
Points: 9471
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 19 November 2008 at 10:14pm |
Rhyley knows please normally gets him what he wants - he is very good at asking for things like Busciut please etc... and he says 'q' for thank you - which I must work on. He also knows to say sorry when he has hurt someone or done something naughty that he has to go to naughty corner for.
Some children can be rather stuborn and I don't want to tell you how 'i; would do it cause what works for me might not for you....
|
876
|
|
FionaS
Senior Member
Joined: 17 April 2007
Location: Auckland
Points: 5117
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 19 November 2008 at 10:24pm |
I decided I wouldn't give her a muslin until she said please today. She was whining on and on "muzzzzy, muzzzy". She refused to say please and screamed and screamed until she broke out in hives on her face! Oh my goodness!
Could she be THAT stubborn or does she really not get it.
Whenever I remind her to say please she just says "yes".
She seems so bright and so good at communication and yet...well, doesn't get some very basic things. It is odd.
|
Mummy to Gabrielle and Ashley
|
|
Kellz
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: Gisborne
Points: 7186
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 20 November 2008 at 7:59am |
Sounds like she is getting it, but is being stubborn!
Isla doenst get anything without saying please, and weve been like that for a few months now,..but its only been just lately that shes started saying please without us prompting her to say it each time.
|
|
baalamb
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Points: 1820
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 20 November 2008 at 8:01am |
Ashlee says please and thank you unprompted now, and has for a while, so 2 isn't too early. Persistence is key, and like Rhyley, Ash knows that saying please gets her what she wants! Lots of praise after she uses her manners helps reinforce it. Sounds like Elle knows what she's doing! If I were you, I wouldn't give in until she said it. Might seem mean, but hopefully she'll get the picture soon that throwing a tantrum takes a longer time than saying please and getting what she wants straight away.
|
|
jaycee
Senior Member
Joined: 11 June 2008
Location: Wellington
Points: 1413
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 20 November 2008 at 8:23am |
I agree that 2 isn't too early. Amy was quite late with talking but still managed to have her version of please and thank you. It sounded like peas and sa. Now she is getting much clearer and is getting better at saying them unprompted.
I make sure that I say please and thank you a lot when she is with me and helping out just to show her where they are used.
Sound like Elle is very smart and has a pretty *strong* character . Just keep at it !!
|
|
|
jack_&_charli
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: christchurch
Points: 7155
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 20 November 2008 at 8:25am |
both my kids say please and thankyou...but it seems to happen more when they aren't prompted. if they don't say it and i remind them, it can take a while for it to come out
i can remember one time when jack was almost 2, he wanted something and he wasn't saying please, even though he usually did. i wasn't going to give in and had to wait 30mins before he finally said it!
|
|
|
pepsi
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Points: 2699
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 20 November 2008 at 9:34am |
A few months ago I thought Alyssa would never use please or thank you either, but I just kept persisting and now she often uses both of them with no prompting (of course, not always). I think they just do it when they feel like it, and Elle is such a clever cookie I'm sure she knows what it means and is just being stubborn
|
|
kezplanet
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: Southbridge, Canterbury
Points: 1120
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 20 November 2008 at 10:11am |
She is testing you Fiona - and they really know how to push right to the limits, be strong and good luck
|
Kerryn, Mum to
Ashlyn(29/3/04), Anastasia(1/11/05) & Abigail (24/02/09)
|
|
CuriousG
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: Raumati South
Points: 1685
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 20 November 2008 at 10:15am |
We still have to remind Charlotte sometimes to say please and thank you. Please comes a lot more easily from her cause she knows she will get something but she pretty much always forgets to say Thank you. Its all work in progress!
|
|
|
peanut butter
Senior Member
Joined: 20 February 2007
Points: 8044
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 20 November 2008 at 11:05am |
Tom has started to say Ta.....sometimes unprompted which really impresses me...but he has also worked out that "Ta" might just get what you want so he says it when he wants somethign too. I am working on please, sounds like "cheese" so I let him off if he says "cheese". Like you, I noticed he can say it when he isnt wanting something and its just copying a word but if he has to say it he WONT!!!
One thing I thought of is do we ALWAYS say please and thankyou with them and with others? I know I dont and I have to make an effort or how can I expect him to.
Bottom line...2 is not too young....just dont expect it everytime and give lots of praise when she does.
|
|
Mum2ET
Senior Member
Joined: 30 August 2007
Location: Whangaparaoa
Points: 3850
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 20 November 2008 at 11:14am |
Ella is like Tom and says Ta when she wants something or instead of saying thank you. She does think that just because she says Ta it means she can have whatever she wants through
|
Mum to
Ella (5) and Tom (2)
|
|
FionaS
Senior Member
Joined: 17 April 2007
Location: Auckland
Points: 5117
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 20 November 2008 at 11:43am |
So does that mean I need to leave her screaming her eyes out (and getting covered in stress hives - which she had never had before!)??
She seemed too worked up to be able to reason or say please yesterday.
She used to say thank you all the time but it has now stopped too.
|
Mummy to Gabrielle and Ashley
|
|
Rachael21
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: New Zealand
Points: 4700
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 20 November 2008 at 12:53pm |
Its up to you Fiona, you know Elle best some children are just easier than others so what works for them might not work for Elle. Maybe wait until she manages to say it herself and then get strict on it. I know with Jack forcing something never works.
|
|
My3Sons
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Points: 3744
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 20 November 2008 at 1:16pm |
yep I agree with Rach&Jack, you cant force her to say anything, all you can do is role model the behaviour ie: when you give her something say "thanks mum" or the good old "what do you say?". We did this with Leo and most of the time he does it unprompted now, problem is he now thinks if he says please and bats his eyelashes he can get anything he wants lol. Good luck Fiona, sounds like you have one determined wee girl there!!
|
|
|
peanut butter
Senior Member
Joined: 20 February 2007
Points: 8044
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 20 November 2008 at 1:38pm |
I'd pick my battles on this one and maybe just say " say please" everytime you expect it but still give her the item anyway followed by "thank you mummy" ..if you dont make a big deal she may just start to cotton on. Making a big deal of it might be becoming a battle of wills and sorry to say, popping out the hives card will beat you any day!
|
|
FionaS
Senior Member
Joined: 17 April 2007
Location: Auckland
Points: 5117
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 20 November 2008 at 1:49pm |
Yeap she is strong willed! If she senses we really want her to do somthing she has an iron will and will refuse. If we stay casual she will eventually catch give in LOL.
|
Mummy to Gabrielle and Ashley
|
|