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caliandjack
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Posted: 14 August 2008 at 10:01pm |
And it is only temporary, most people want to get ahead financially and job wise, which means going to work.
Once children are kindy/school age there isn't really any excuse not to do something to bring in some extra $$s. I expect Dh to support his children but not me as well.
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[/url] Angel June 2012
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Maya
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Posted: 14 August 2008 at 10:02pm |
My dad always gave me a hard time when I was on the benefit, he was so proud when I got off it even tho I was actually about $15 a week worse off than I was on the benefit to start with lol!
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Maya Grace (28/02/03)
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The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
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caitlynsmygirl
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Posted: 14 August 2008 at 11:20pm |
oops meant to say , if money is too tight then once bub number two is in school (or kindy even ) i'll go back , even just part time , i dont like the work side of work (would prefer it if it was called Lie on sun lounger listening to music and working on tan ) but i DO enjoy making money
Even more than that , i enjoy SPENDING money , im really good at that
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lilfatty
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Posted: 15 August 2008 at 8:30am |
Just sticking up for menfolk ...
My DH stays at home and cares for Isabelle ... so not all men dont think its a job.
HOWEVER .....
He does think it is waaaay easier than working
But he does have the same fears as mums at home like .. how do I get back into the workforce post Isabelle?
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Mazzy
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Posted: 15 August 2008 at 10:13am |
Ok, so I've read the first two pages and the last two pages - I knew I should have opened this thread earlier!
Nikki, I really enjoyed that article you linked to at the start and agree with it - if this policy results in such a massive change to workplaces, making them more family friendly in general then that is awesome and everyone will benefit from it.
I also agree with what Rach said before, except I would amend that to make FAMILIES more valued (in whatever form each family takes), because there are a lot of grandparents and dads and aunts and uncles out there doing amazing jobs with kids too.
Now for the DPB/student loan/govt. assistance issue. I'm of two minds on this. My mum was on the DPB in the eighties when things were made a lot harder for single parents due to government policy (can't remember exactly what happened, just remember my mum being really stressed). She had two kids and no support and was also working part time in an orchard and cleaning to make ends meet. Then she went back to study full time and got her nursing degree when I was 12 and my brother was 10. While studying full time, she also took a night job at a rest home because we were still struggling with whatever benefits she recieved at the time. For the life of me, I have no idea how she did it - working all night, looking after us kids and studying during the day and very rarely getting a break. She wouldn't have made it without the financial help from the government. And she sure as hell didn't slack off before she started studying.
As soon as she graduated she had a job and hasn't stopped working since. However, during those early years there was no way she could have put any savings away and now I realise she's going to struggle a bit when she stops working because she's way behind in any type of retirement savings...so the ramifications of that time keep coming back to affect her life. We will help her as much as possible, of course.
On the flip side, DH earns a good salary and we are lucky that I can stay home with the girls at this stage and we can live without having to worry too much about groceries, bills etc. We definitely won't be 'getting ahead' any time soon, but I figure that goes with the territory when you have young kids, it's a sacrifice we chose to make. It will be hard when I go back to work and if I wanted to do some further study there isn't any assistance available for us, which I guess does seem a bit unfair, but I'm not sure that is really relevant to the DPB - seems more like an issue of how the student loan/allowance scheme is set up.
I don't like how much we are taxed at the moment, I'd like to see some tax breaks for families with one parent at home - Ginger's early post about splitting the income for evaluation purposes is something I really agree with. But I'm also happy that some of my money is going to help single parents and families that need it. I know first hand how bl**dy tough it is and while I'd like to see some relief for two-parent families who need it for study etc. I don't think it should be at the expense of those on the DPB who need it. There will always be those taking advantage of the system but that doesn't mean we should throw the whole thing in and punish those that need it too.
Whew! Novel! Sorry if this is just rehashing stuff that's been discussed already.
Edited by Mazzy
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Rachael21
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Posted: 15 August 2008 at 1:38pm |
I agree with Kelly there, I am extrememly greatful to be in a country that gives us free healthcare,schooling and it is nice to know that I will always be able to feed my kids and keep the warm no matter what the circumstances. So yes things could be a lot worse if we were in another country.
I also think is quite funny how the ones who aren't happy with the amount of financial support they get want to make life harder for single Mums. How is forcing single Mums to work going to benefit you?
I think this country seems to think that single mothers need to get out and work/study whatever but mothers in marriage/partnership need to stay home with their children. Where is the support for mothers to go out and work or study and where is the support for single mothers who chose to stay at home. Childcare is a job and so is cleaning and cooking so why isn't motherhood (by motherhood I mean running the household so Mr Lilfatty comes under this) considered an actual job. I wouldn't even need to be paid just maybe contributions to kiwisaver made for me and maybe more help with study or getting into the workforce to show to the rest of society that motherhood is a job and a perfectly legitimate career choice.
Its all about choice, the choice to stay at home if they want, the choice to study/work if they want. As I have said before women HAVE to have babies to keep our species alive so why should women be punished if they chose to work/study, they could of not had the baby in the first place and then our society would be in real trouble. Children don't raise themselves so why isn't it a valid choice to do what women have been doing since humans came onto this earth?
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caitlynsmygirl
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Posted: 15 August 2008 at 2:07pm |
Well said Rach
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james
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Posted: 15 August 2008 at 2:11pm |
RachandJack wrote:
I agree with Kelly there, I am extrememly greatful to be in a country that gives us free healthcare,schooling and it is nice to know that I will always be able to feed my kids and keep the warm no matter what the circumstances. So yes things could be a lot worse if we were in another country.
I also think is quite funny how the ones who aren't happy with the amount of financial support they get want to make life harder for single Mums. How is forcing single Mums to work going to benefit you?
I think this country seems to think that single mothers need to get out and work/study whatever but mothers in marriage/partnership need to stay home with their children. Where is the support for mothers to go out and work or study and where is the support for single mothers who chose to stay at home. Childcare is a job and so is cleaning and cooking so why isn't motherhood (by motherhood I mean running the household so Mr Lilfatty comes under this) considered an actual job. I wouldn't even need to be paid just maybe contributions to kiwisaver made for me and maybe more help with study or getting into the workforce to show to the rest of society that motherhood is a job and a perfectly legitimate career choice.
Its all about choice, the choice to stay at home if they want, the choice to study/work if they want. As I have said before women HAVE to have babies to keep our species alive so why should women be punished if they chose to work/study, they could of not had the baby in the first place and then our society would be in real trouble. Children don't raise themselves so why isn't it a valid choice to do what women have been doing since humans came onto this earth?
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well said
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Candkids
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Posted: 15 August 2008 at 6:20pm |
i think its more aimed at the ones who are on the DPB and stick their kids in daycare so they can go spend their dpb money on alcohol/ drugs and going out on the weekends!
i have a friend who did this, basicly a job would cut into her social life
also
with working for families tax credits single mums are actually better off working 20hrs a week, STILL getting the childcare subsidy and you can still get a accomodation suppliment & in work tax credits.
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lilfatty
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Posted: 15 August 2008 at 6:45pm |
Yes I heard that mentioned on the breakfast show the other morning when they were talking to John Keys ... so it seemed like a good thing for Mummies to do if they were in a position to do it.
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caliandjack
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Posted: 15 August 2008 at 8:08pm |
Rach I think it requires a complete change in societies way of thinking and being.
As my 65 year old Dad said when PPL was introduced why should women get paid just cause they've had a baby, its that attitude that need to change, he's old school. But there are more like him and they're in govt.
Helen Clark may have her faults, but she's done more for women and families in the last 9 years, than any previous government, and I'm not sure John Key is as sympathetic.
Just cause he was raised by a beneficiary, doesn't mean he gets to make rules for the rest.
I would love to see a universal family allowance / also a student one, why should these sectors of society be left out, when the unemployed and the sick get help.
Raising a family and/or being a student to me is working.
Sorry for the novel.
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[/url] Angel June 2012
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Mazzy
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Posted: 15 August 2008 at 10:21pm |
fleury wrote:
I would love to see a universal family allowance / also a student one, why should these sectors of society be left out, when the unemployed and the sick get help.
Raising a family and/or being a student to me is working. |
I don't think a universal family allowance would be a good thing. Then we'd all be beneficiaries and I don't agree with relying on the state that much. I for one don't like the idea of having to deal with beuracracy like that unless I have to. So many of the people on the DPB and other benefits don't actually want to be on them and are working hard to create opportunities for themselves to live without state assistance.
I guess I look at it as my mum worked so hard to get off the benefit and to make sure my brother and I didn't have to rely on the government to live, so why on earth would I want to go on one just because I have kids?
The unemployed and the sick get help because often they have no choice in being in that situation and need help to get going again. That's what those benefits are for and I have no problem with a society that helps those that need it. In my mind it's like a hospital A&E waiting room - those with the most life-threatening injuries get treated first but the service is still there for the rest of us if we need it.
Raising a family or being a student is working, but I don't think doing either means we should automatically deserve a hand out.
Edited by Mazzy
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Mazzy
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Posted: 15 August 2008 at 10:46pm |
Just had to add - when the heck did I become so right wing? DH has obviously been influencing me!
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james
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Posted: 16 August 2008 at 7:00am |
i,m just trying to figure out why it so fcocssed on us dpb mums and not the ub bums who half of them are lazy and dont have a exurce to be at home
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lilfatty
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Posted: 16 August 2008 at 8:58am |
James...
I think it was because there are far more people that stay on the DPB longterm and they figure that stating Mums should go to work/study when the child is at school .. is not too harsh (as they arent saying abandon your child before the child is school aged), but shows the voting public that National will "address" the issue.
We have the lowest unemployment in the history of our lil country so the "numbers" dont cause enough sensationalism in the media to warrant going after them.
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james
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Posted: 16 August 2008 at 9:59am |
lilfatty wrote:
James...
I think it was because there are far more people that stay on the DPB longterm and they figure that stating Mums should go to work/study when the child is at school .. is not too harsh (as they arent saying abandon your child before the child is school aged), but shows the voting public that National will "address" the issue.
We have the lowest unemployment in the history of our lil country so the "numbers" dont cause enough sensationalism in the media to warrant going after them.
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oh of coruse national want our votes will get intro groverment then find out there policys dont work backtrack to change there minds say we never said that scerw the country over again and then we vote in labour who fix it all again thats right i forgot about that
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Natalie_G
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Posted: 25 August 2008 at 8:18pm |
I believe benefits are there to help people get back on their feet, after the youngest child turns 6 what excuse is there not to get a job there are lots of people to manage to work and have children.
With student loans I read someone mentioned, this is just a temp help because it is paid back, benefits arent.
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