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Termination for medical reasons

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LP pka Rainyday View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote LP pka Rainyday Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 June 2016 at 6:13pm
GP was good, except she made me cry. She's seriously so lovely. So I've started the pill. Might muck my cycle up a bit starting CD13 but I'm not too worried about that. She was happy to help in anyway with regards to contacting about my follow up appointment etc which is great.
Pre auction offer accepted last night so auction has been moved to Friday!! Crazy times
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote babycrazy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 June 2016 at 7:41pm
Glad the GP was lovely. Just what you needed.
And crazy you could have sold your house by the weekend! Exciting times.

Been ok here -,hanging for school hols. Trying to sort Ivf and having the it's not fair moments thanks to AF hormones.
Such is my life now.
TTC since Oct 2009
4 x DI's failed
IVF1 CP & MC
IVF2 CP
IVF3 Angel baby born 22.3wks
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote LP pka Rainyday Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 June 2016 at 9:02pm
Hugs BC. I've been having a lot of days like that.

House is sold! Celebrated with champagne and a game of thrones catch up. Champagne has gone to my head and now I'm ready for bed!!

Hope everyone has a good weekend.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote babycrazy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 June 2016 at 9:31pm
Congrats on selling the house! Must be a bit of a relief?

So glad it's the weekend!!
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LP pka Rainyday View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote LP pka Rainyday Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 June 2016 at 7:16pm
Never really thought it wouldn't sell. It just all happened so quick I didn't have time to.think it would fall through!!

I thunk the next step is going to be more stressful.
I've been pretty good this week. Just had a major angry moment this evening. So annoyed at the world with regards to my babies
It's Damn unfair. Thinking about the "should have beens"

I have chocolate. That might help.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote babycrazy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 June 2016 at 7:56pm
Hope that chocolate helps you feel better.
I've been doing a little bit of the should have beens too. Should've been 36wks now and should've been going on leave in two weeks. Should have a big belly. The list goes on. It fully blows!!!
Going home to my parents for a week in the holidays. Looking forward to seeing home and the farm but kinda feel sad about the fact I'm not having a baby these holidays.
TTC since Oct 2009
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IVF1 CP & MC
IVF2 CP
IVF3 Angel baby born 22.3wks
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote babycrazy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 June 2016 at 8:01pm
And I got this sudden urge to pull out the knitting I started 2 years ago when I got utd the first time. I've had periods where I can't even look at it and then when Paige came along I got stuck in to get it (a blanket) done. Of course got busy in term 1 and then lost her so didn't get it done. Now determined to finish it regardless of what the future holds. It's therapeutic but also hurts at the same time.
TTC since Oct 2009
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IVF1 CP & MC
IVF2 CP
IVF3 Angel baby born 22.3wks
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LP pka Rainyday View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote LP pka Rainyday Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 July 2016 at 7:12pm
How are you BC? How was the farm? That's lovely you have a wee project to finish in Paige's memory ❤

8 weeks today. I'm mostly good most days.
I've got enough distractions to keep me busy
I miss my girl endlessly. I miss being pregnant.
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Hey chick. I've been thinking of you lots this week/weekend. Glad you've got some distractions to keep your mind busy. I found it helps most of the time to be busy. I hear you though. I miss being pregnant too. July is my due month although the actual date is later in the month. I've been a bit up and down, not hugely but enough to unsettle.
I have one more square in my blanket to go then I can start putting it altogether. Got super busy so it's gone on the wayside again lol. But will holidays coming up I'll get it done. Our little 5 acres is doing well haha. DH is busy getting a shed built for his work trucks so that's a bit exciting.

On the whole I'm ok. Finally got the consents back to the clinic to do IVF in August. Have a little glimmer of hope that it'll all work out ok.

How's the house stuff going?
TTC since Oct 2009
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote LP pka Rainyday Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 09 July 2016 at 1:46pm
A little glimmer of hope is all you need right? August is so close how are you feeling about going through the various procedures?

House stuff is a bit crazy and up in the air at the moment. Looked at some sections this mornig and about to go to another open home for an auction on Wednesday. Missed out on a house I really wanted at auction on Wednesday just gone but not too worried about it now. Onwards and upwards. Super busy with my business and normal work and life in general

Got knocked for six when i rang auckland MFM about my follow up appointment to be told they have no results yet and it could be another 3 weeks at the least. It's nine weeks on monday, im disappointed to say the least. It left me very emotional and just looking at flowers in the supermarket today while I was waiting to buy lotto was enough to get me feeling teary again although I think I'm getting my period so that doesn't help.

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DD born sleeping 09.05.16 22w5d
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote babycrazy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 09 July 2016 at 4:04pm
Man must be the day for it - having a major low that day. Almost lost my sh*t at netball - got to car and bawled. On my way to stay with my parents. Much needed break.

Stink about your results. I get how upsetting it is that's for sure.

Gotta go but will post later today. Xx
TTC since Oct 2009
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote babycrazy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 09 July 2016 at 11:36pm
I'm back. Sorry for such a quick post I was in line at the supermarket lol!
Have arrived at my parents for r&r until Friday. Exhausted so it's a welcome holiday.

Strange what makes you teary hey. The thought of pak n save hurts me - that's where we went right after our first bad scan with Paige - DH got groceries while I cried the whole way round. Coming home was a hurdle too. Last time I was here was just before we had our MFM appt and it was my brothers wedding. Had to pretend all weekend things were amazing.

Anywho like you say onwards and upwards. Feel better for my big cry. Sorry you missed out on the house you wanted but think something will come up at the right time. Good to hear the business is going well and busy too.

Have mixed feelings about the ivf. I like to be in control of my life but during ivf you're at the mercy of the clinic and trying to juggle work can be full on too. But work is amazing so that halves the worry.

Hope your weekend goes ok. Good to hear from you Hun xx
TTC since Oct 2009
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IVF1 CP & MC
IVF2 CP
IVF3 Angel baby born 22.3wks
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote LP pka Rainyday Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 11 July 2016 at 12:59pm
Hope you seriously enjoy your down time at home. Yes a good cry does wonders.

Sounds like you are doing so well BC. Things improved over the weekend.
The busy-ness is really helping. It gives me something to look forward to and I'm not even thinking about TTC again which is a weight off my shoulders for now.

It's so sunny and warm (inside) today have already been out for a play date/coffee with our mums group. Two preggy ladies, was a little hard to see their bellies but quickly brushed it aside.

Some days I wish I had a crystal ball and other days, I think that it wouldn't help at all!!
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Totally enjoying my break. Daily sits in the spa at the parents are just lovely. The sun is shining and I can just lay around reading my book if I want lol. Got my back / pelvis fixed today. Was out of line after having Paige.
You sound like you're doing better each week Hun. Always going to be those tricky days but the time between stretches further.
A crystal ball would be fricking awesome - is love to know what the next 6mths will bring. No further just that far.

Well done for surviving today with your mums group. Always tricky.
Do you think you'll try ttc again sometime in the future?
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote LP pka Rainyday Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 17 July 2016 at 2:06pm
Sunshine and spa sounds amazing. Crazy how such a wee girl can put you so out of line physically. Glad you're feeling better.

We will definitely ttc again. Probably next year i would say. Could change my mind on that though.
CD4 on period 2 since giving birth and going on the pill. I think it's taken me four days to use the same number of pads and tampons I did in one day last month. So Glad I'm on the pill & don't have to deal.with such horrendous bleeding.
Going to the Gold coast next month for business conference so.will probably skip that period.
Been pretty up and down this week.
Looking at putting an offer on a new build (just framing at the moment) as we missed out at auction again last week


Edited by LP pka Rainyday - 17 July 2016 at 2:07pm
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote babycrazy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 July 2016 at 9:23am
Hey. Away with girlfriends for a night hence delayed reply. Glad to hear your period has settled. I was lucky to have my body just go straight back its usual routine.

Sorry to hear you've been up and down. I have too, due date was this week coming so I keep thinking about that. Hopefully once that passes I can start thinking forward a bit more. I still have awful moments of how unfair it all is. Big hugs Hun.
Bummer you missed another house but hope the next one is the one.

Off for a day shopping now but back to the grindstone tomorrow 🙄
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IVF1 CP & MC
IVF2 CP
IVF3 Angel baby born 22.3wks
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Took DS to the doctor today for a general check up after a nasty cough that's not letting up. He's fine of course but GP did mention that the autopsy report is back for Micah. I was a bit numb when she said that. She said there was "nothing we didn't already know" in there but I still didn't read it. I'll request a copy and see whether we will also have an appointment with the dr to go through it.
Very wobbly this morning, I hope I'm not like this every single Monday
11 weeks today.

On a lighter note we went unconditional on a house, new build (partially done with framing and a roof) so now the tough part of finding somewhre to live in the mean time as the settlement dates are way out.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote babycrazy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 July 2016 at 8:05pm
Huge hugs hun. Never easy when something like that comes out of the blue. Only natural to be a bit wobbly here and there.
Great news about the house. Congratulations. Wow cool to have a brand new build to move into eventually.
You haven't had a specialist follow up yet have you re Micah?

My mind is a bit more settled. I've reflected that the week prior and then during AF is clearly playing a massive role in my state of mind. Honestly I thought I was going to go insane and then once AF finished everything settled in my mind and I felt heaps better. Even got through the whole 'due' date thing. I must admit though I'm finding things like my confidence are shot. I over think things - especially interactions with people and then it upsets me or plays on my mind. I'm pretty sure most of the time I'm blowing things ways out of proportion. Then I have moments where I feel like I must be the worst person in the world to be around because I feel so angry inside and sometimes can't think outside my own bubble.
See .... this is me after AF has finished so chuck in hormones and yep going insane. Start IVF next cycle which I guess is probably also adding to the mind-f*** that I'm having right now.

But in spite of all that I've just spewed onto the page I'm still at 90% ok. Believe it or not.....
TTC since Oct 2009
4 x DI's failed
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IVF2 CP
IVF3 Angel baby born 22.3wks
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote LP pka Rainyday Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 29 July 2016 at 2:40pm
hi lovely,
no we haven't had our follow up yet. I've been waiting for it. NOw that I know the report is in, if I don't get an appointment soon i'll follow up.
Hope you get out of your funk soon. Glad you got through your due date. There are lots of babies popping up on facebook lately which has been alittle hard to see. Sometimes that personal bubble is there to protect you I think and you need to spend a bit of time in there so you can face the real world again.
Golly I think it's inevitable but I really hope the IVF doesn't add too much to the craziest in your head.
Had a lovely lunch with a friend today and we chatted about Micah and I was surpirsed at what made me cry and what I could talk about easily. Grief is such an odd thing.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote babycrazy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 29 July 2016 at 3:11pm
Yay for a lovely lunch today. And yay that you're friend was open to chatting about Micah too. Grief is a bit strange and I don't think you can truly appreciate it until you've been through it. I have a few friends who aren't too afraid to ask how I am, and actually mean it (if that makes sense). I try to be pretty honest, especially if I'm not doing well. But it's quite interesting really as it's like there's a time limit on asking about the loss of a baby and then people just stop. It could also be me though as I find I don't talk so openly as I was. Guess I don't want to people to feel sorry for me. Not to worry, I keep her alive in my mind.
Random awkward story though - DH was in a shop the other day and the lady who served him knew us and mentioned that I mustn't be far off due so then he had to explain what happened to her. But being typical him he said it in such a crass way that I cringed when he told me, thankfully he did explain the full story.

Back to work this week which has helped as a distraction and keeps my mind busy so life is ticking along nicely. First lot of drugs arrived yesterday but still a couple weeks before I start the IVF.

Stink you haven't had you're appt yet. 11+ weeks is way too long to wait. I'd almost be ringing now.

Did you sort out where to live now that you're building?
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IVF1 CP & MC
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IVF3 Angel baby born 22.3wks
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